Chapter 7: Chapter 6: What you don’t know

Yua's POV

I came back from our shopping venture, and am currently lying down on my bed. A lot of things have happened these last two weeks.

The worst is seeing a face I didn't want to see. I can't believe we go to the same university together, when I've been trying to avoid him most of my highschool life.

Afterall, even if it wasn't intentional it… brought up the memory of why I avoided him in the first place. 

It was during highschool, in a similar situation to this one. It was a typical case of someone confessing and the receiver rejecting. I never really held feelings for any of the guys, because I simply didn't care enough.

"Hey what are you-?!

It should normally end there, but he grabbed me and pushed me to the wall. So yeah, I was the one who rejected him.

I honestly thought it was over that day, he was trying to force himself on me despite being at the back of a school building. At least, until someone came in.

"Wow someone is really out here trying to do the unthinkable. The administrators will have a field day with this footage!"

A girl in my class who I was more or less acquainted with appeared before me holding her phone.

Nuri Park.

She was basically the figurehead and the go to girl in our class regarding anything. Afterall, she was built like a heroine from a 'rom com slice of life'. She had long black hair, a slim body and quite honestly, a beautiful face. Her breasts were a size bigger too, I think at a 'B'? 

She was also athletic and smart. So yeah, I wasn't exaggerating when I said 'heroine'. I don't swing that way, but all I'm saying is; I understand. 

Prior to this we only occasionally talked but nothing more.

"Oi wait wait come on this isn't-"

"Look, if you don't want your social life to disappear I suggest you get out of here and never do this again."

Without a moment to spare, the boy ran.

"...Thank you, really… I was-"

"Hey, it's okay. You don't need to force yourself. Anyone would be scared after something like that."

She seemed to gesture at my hands, which I realized were shaking. 

So taking her advice, I calmed down before finally speaking again.

"...Thank you really, but how did you know this was happening?"

"Oh I was hiding in the bushes over there recording the whole thing!"

"...Umm, isn't that a breach of privacy? Wait, isn't that also illegal?!"

I suddenly twitched and backed away from her.

"Hey wait before you get the wrong idea I only keep the footage to myself! I've never leaked the other ones either! I do it because it feels like I'm watching a drama!"

"Hey regardless, you really shouldn't do that. It's like you're taking others' feelings for granted."

I feel somewhat bad for saying that to someone who just helped me, but I couldn't just let it continue.

"...You're right. This shouldn't be done at all. I'm sorry."

"Ahh no, it's okay as long as you understand. Sorry for saying that when you already helped me out."

We just bowed to each other kind of awkwardly as we both apologized.

"... If it's alright with you, could you not make what happened known to others?"

"Huh? But… I see."

"Right."

Although it's good to take action, it could actually bring up trouble for me. This could be the turning point to potentially leading him to take revenge since it would push him into the corner. Who knows what someone could do then.

"...Well as awkward as this may sound, how about we make a deal?"

"Deal?"

"Let's keep what happened today a secret. I don't want people to find out I've done this, and you don't want what happened today to leak out. So let's just keep it between us then."

"Ahh, that would make the most sense...In that case let's go with that."

"Great! I know we've talked a few times, but I'm Nuri."

"Why introduce yourself again?"

"Because unlike before, we are now partners in crime! Consider yourself my accomplice!"

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"When did I become an accomplice?!"

"Since now hahaha!"

She laughed and I couldn't help but sigh as we returned back to the classroom. Ever since we went from becoming acquaintances, to actual friends. If anything, we're each other's closest friend now.

I've done everything I could to avoid boys since then. And if I got into contact with one coincidentally, I would make myself boring and disrespectful enough for them to not want to associate. Well, I'm not sure if I'm faking it anymore.

With that being said, I was approached by one on the first day of my second year in University. Clearly I was doomed to fail from the start.

I was about to coldly turn down any sort of conversation he brought up, but I made eye contact with him.

Rather than nervousness, he looked angry. He attempted to hide it with his neutral expression, but I don't think he realized his eyebrows twitched. Pretty funny actually.

Right when I was about to say something he began to talk…

What did he mean by "Reading it the wrong way?" You're telling me there's more than one way to read a book? 

Regardless of that, I noticed that he wasn't trying to hit on me at all. Rather he was talking to me because it seemed like he took my mistake personally. Though honestly, I'm surprised to see someone brave enough to talk about weeb things to someone. I've been closeted for as long as I remember. 

With that being said, when he finished talking and began to walk away, I noticed his ears were slightly red. I guess he was flustered after all.

Honestly... 

I've been enjoying this semester more than I thought.

It's fun talking to Kyura, but I'll do everything in my power to not say it to his face. It's too embarrassing.

When we were out at G&R, during the conversation I already felt like going home since I got tired. Though unfortunately, when Kyura left I didn't jump on the opportunity fast enough. So I waited a few minutes before leaving to make it seem natural.

But I guess he walks pretty slowly, because along the way, I saw him head to the loss prevention office. So I got curious and asked the lady what he dropped off.

I just gave the excuse that maybe it was an item that I lost and she told me what it was. In fact she asked me if I knew his name. Did he not bother to give his info? He could be rewarded for something like that though.

When he helped me out that night, I noticed he intervened using very general methods. He had a phone in his hand saying that he forgot it and was late to our meetup. Needless to say, we didn't plan to meet at all, especially when we just left not so long ago. 

He also didn't mention my name, or give any references showing that he or I was a student in this University. He looked at the general building for that, and could possibly back it up saying he was working part time there. He could say his backpack was for his lunch.

Just when I dismissed how far he thought, he casually brought up the bus station being in a public place. I began to admire his foresight.

When I thanked him, he was about to say something but decided to leave instead. I think he refrained most likely because he thought I would be uncomfortable. Needless to say, I stopped him.

"Stupid honestly, you helped me out so you're the only guy I would be comfortable with."

...Ha~, I feel so embarrassed with myself right now acting like a tsundere, so I'll just hide under my blanket.

With that being said, I'm glad I was able to thank him properly. Judging from his personality, I thought he would have been adamant about refusing it.

...But there is something that's been bothering me ever since we parted ways:

I felt like I acted weird today.

It's weird saying that about myself but it's true. Like that time when he reassured me about coming along. It made me feel guilty, but also happy that he would spare the time at all. Conflicting isn't it?

Also when we were looking for a gift in the clothing store. Well honestly, I led us there to throw him off, because it would be obvious who it was for if we went straight to the bookstore.

There a lady went to help him. That same helper was already wandering around close to us, but didn't bother to interact with us until I left. So when I saw them happily talking afterwards, I began to feel a negative emotion.

Before I knew it I headed in that direction without grabbing anything.

...I'm pretty sure I just felt disrespected for being avoided? I mean who wouldn't be, I'm literally a potential buyer so why?!

I didn't even notice I was clenching my hand pretty hard until he pointed it out. So I had to pretend like I had something. He really is observant of the smallest things. 

Regardless of that, I was more worried than I thought because I had no idea how to get the present for him secretly. Luckily he had to go to the washroom. I also asked him to meet me at the bubble tea place in case he finished quickly. That was enough time to get it.

Lastly, I decided to ask him a random question to fill the silence. Unexpectedly, I came up with a question about goals. Since it was random, I thought he would joke about his answer, but he responded seriously. And I was thankful that he did.

"To appreciate the smallest things huh…"

As cringe as it may sound, it was the deciding factor for me to firmly believe that he is a good person. I think it made me smile like an idiot, so I had to turn away and say it was cheesy. Afterall, I don't want to admit it made me feel warm inside.

I think this is when a possibility hit me. My strange behavior and overly conscious acts. It's probably because he's the first, close male friend I've ever had. So I don't really know how to act.

"Close friend huh…"

It should sound right, and be the most accurate description. I've distanced myself from guys and just recently opened up to one. It makes sense. So why…

Why does it feel like I'm holding something back?

Suddenly, my screen changed into night time mode. As if it was their queue, my eyes began to slowly close. I completely forgot it's getting late now as it's 00:00.

...Well, I guess I'm in no rush to find out. 

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