Chapter 28: Baby don’t hurt me

Inside the computer’s room, I silently sip my coffee.

Watching anime with my headphones on, I yawn.

It’s been almost a day since Schwa left for her mission, it should be way past time for the auction.

Yet, I still receive no news from her.

I’m not really worried, but if everything went according to plan, she should have messaged me an hour ago.

She told me she’s going to communicate the strict minimum so she won’t get suspicious…

I hope the idiot didn’t jinx everything in the first hours.

And I still don’t know if we can truly count on the two Chinese…

Minutes go on, and at the climax of the episode, my phone finally vibrates.

 

---

 

Francesco follows me in the corridor leading to his cabin, humming a cheerful air.

I don’t want a rich boy who’s looking for an amusement to take part in our mission, and I’m thinking of a way to neutralize him.

But he’s an acquaintance of DIANA, so I don’t want to kill him.

Should I break his legs and lock him in his cabin?

Considering how loud he speaks, I should also muzzle him if I do that.

I’m also going to take all his communication equipment, his smartphones, he may have multiple since he’s rich, but also the cabin’s electronics like TVs, etc., they’re probably connected to the Internet.

But if he can drop from a balcony to another, that would be an issue as well. With broken legs, it would hurt a lot, but it’s not impossible.

Before I have the time to consider all the different possibilities, we reached the cabin’s door.

Still deep in my thoughts, I mechanically unlock it with the key and open the door.

And I have no time to react when Francesco violently pushes me inside.

I fall on the floor of the cabin’s lobby and admire for a second how soft the carpet is.

I didn’t consider this guy a threat for a single second, what a mistake.

“Prendila!” he shouts.

I try to get back on my feet, but two guys in black suits and sunglasses jump on me from deep inside and lock me down.

At least the carpet is comfy.

 

---

 

“Wait! Wait! Block the elevator!”

A couple of old geezers are slowly running toward me.

Out of breath, they break the sound limit on the unbelievably long 20 meters that separate them from the elevator.

It takes them around half a minute to reach their destination.

I was pushing the “open the doors” button this whole time, but I also thought about leaving without them all the way through.

With my finger near the numbers, I wait for them to catch their breath to ask my question. “So… Which deck are you going to?”

I had already pressed the button for deck 12 so the elevator already started moving.

“I… have no idea!” Shouts the man.

“We… Went into an adventure!!” Continues the woman.

I really should have left them in the corridor.

“You… Aren’t going anywhere?!”

The man straightens himself. “Nope, we ARE going somewhere!”

“We’re going to find the grail!”

I frown.

“Are you drunk?”

“Nope! Perfectly sane, perfectly healthy.”

The woman starts doing squats. “Can’t you see how fast we ran!”

“Thanks again for keeping the doors open.” The man winks.

I sigh.

The old couple looks at each other.

“Oh my, why are you sighing, beautiful lady?” Asks the woman.

“Beautiful?”

“Why, yes, you’re so beautiful with your pretty dress and polished nails! We have a granddaughter that looks just like you!” She continues, taking my hand.

“You do! And that’s a compliment! We love our granddaughter!” Adds the man.

I laugh.

Why did I end up in an elevator with the most eccentric geezers on the boat?

They smile honestly when they see me laugh.

“Young lady, you’re so pretty when you laugh, you should laugh more instead of sighing. When I was your age, I used to sigh a lot too, and now see who I was stuck with for 50 years!” She points at her partner.

“Oi!” He responds.

For some reason, speaking with them seems easier than with most people.

“You’re so carefree!” I laugh.

“Naturally, at our age, we shouldn’t care about a single thing! How about you? Why are you sighing?”

“Is it love?” Winks the man again.

“Shut up!” The old woman smacks him with her fan. “Young girls would never speak about love with an old man like you!”

I take a second to ask: “What is love, exactly?”

They look at each other silently, before the man joyfully begins: “It’s when you feel palpitations when looking at someone!”

“Did you ever feel palpitations when looking at me?!” The woman frowns.

“All the time, even right now.” He smiles.

“You’re so silly. No, young lady, it’s when you feel a connection with someone.”

“A connection?” I raise an eyebrow.

“Yes, it’s when you feel they understand you without saying a word.”

I meditate about it.

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“Or when you feel lonely when they’re away.” She continues.

“Also, when you can’t see any issues with someone’s behaviors, love can make you blind!” Adds the man.

“But that’s not the case at all! I dislike so many things about her personality! She’s arrogant and mean and bossy, always calling me ‘stupid’ or forcing me to do things I don’t want to. She’s not nice at all and I want to shut her mouth at times!”

The elevator rings and the doors finally open, but nobody moves.

The woman smiles. “Well, I hate a lot of things that my husband does as well.”

“WHAT?!”

“But whoever that person is, she shouldn’t force you to do things you hate. How about confronting her about it, sometimes?”

“I don’t think confrontation is a good thing…” Whispers the old man, who slowly moves out of the cabin.

The old woman holds my hands again and looks in my eyes with a daring stare.

“How about you tell her all that when you see her?”

“T-tell her what?”

“All you hate about her!”

“Ah…”

And then she drops my hands and moves out as well. “Yes, I think that’s a good solution.”

“I…”

Before I have the time to add something, the old man shouts: “Young lady!”

He shouted like he’s miles away, but he’s actually just five meters in front of me.

“Thanks again for holding the door, we’re off to find the holy grail!”

“I’m sure you will be okay!” Waves the old woman.

And now they slowly walk away.

But what do I do?

It’s my deck, and if I walk normally, I’m just going to walk past them and will turn all this emotional goodbye into something cringeworthy.

So, I just wait for a few minutes that they get out of sight.

 

---

 

“What the fuck do you want now?” I ask.

Francesco and his minions pulled me deeper in the cabin so I could admire how fancy it actually is.

This VIP lounge is too good to be true, but tied up on the sofa as I am, I can only see it partially.

“I told you already, I want to be part of your mission.”

“Are you going to force me to add you? There is no room for another person!”

“No, no!” He says, moving his finger left and right. “You underestimate the Cavalcanti again.”

“I admit I underestimated you.”

“Perfect! Now we can have a discussion on equal terms!”

“So, untie me now.”

“Not yet! You haven’t accepted to add me!”

I tried to get out by my own strength already, but it’s too tight and his two minions next to him are just going to crush me when I manage to do it.

“Alright, tell me. What are you good for? Why should I recruit you?”

This is the weirdest job interview I’ve ever seen.

“I’m rich. I can help you get very, very close to the jewels.”

“We already have a plan for that. Pass.”

I see he is irritated. I bet he can’t guess what we planned.

“I am gorgeous, charismatic and eloquent, I’m the perfect scapegoat!”

How would anybody want to have this role?!

“I’m ashamed to say this, but we have someone for that as well…”

I guess it’s supposed to be me?

“I see you’re prepared for a lot of things, but how about your escape?”

He put his finger on one of our flaws. We lack an efficient escape route.

The original idea was to use the safety boats to leave the ship with the jewels, but it’s very dangerous clearly not the best option.

“What’s your idea?”

“Well…”

“Ladies and Gentlemen. We are happy to inform you that the main event of this cruise will begin in 30 minutes. Please navigate toward the atrium to take the Deck 0’s dedicated elevators, if you wish to assist or participate in the Sea of Stars auction.”

His voice is partially covered by the announcer but I still heard everything.

“You’re taken.”

A smile draws on his face and the bonk of a slammed door can be heard from the lobby.

“BOOBIES? WHY ARE YOU TIED UP, ARE YOU INTO BDSM?!”

I’m pissed.

“Ask your dear friend to untie me, for fuck’s sake.”

She looks at Francesco and the two mobs near him and shrugs.

“I guess he likes you, you’re so popular Boobies!”

“?!”

I’m speechless, but I guess she turned back to normal.

“Liberala.” Francesco finally says so the mobs untie me.

The idiot looks around in awe and pronounces: “Dannazione, questo posto è fantastico ma non vale niente in confronto a casa tua !”

“Non te lo dico.”

The language shenanigans are back as well…

I massage my writs and stretch my back.

Showing them the clock on my smartphone, I sigh.

“Oi ragazzi, it’s time to move to deck 0.”

The auctions have begun.

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