Chapter 7 – Still Fragile.

Fraser slumped back into the sofa and Uriah, rubbing his temples. That talk, and the fact that Julia had come to visit him in the first place, had left him confused. Despite the tone of some of the conversation, she was actually quite a bit nicer than he’d assumed. And beautiful too. She had pain, underneath all of that as well, lurking there. That he easily recognised, even though she had taken pains to hide it all. He had more than his fair share, and it was easy to see it in others. If he wanted to, he felt that Julia was actually someone that he could easily get along with. But he didn’t know if he wanted that. Friendships had always been messy for him, given his parent’s influence.

She also seemed quite taken with Uriah...

Well, who wouldn’t be. He was really good looking. Handsome. Attractive. But that also made Fraser a bit jealous, and insecure. Sure, Uriah hadn’t shown any interest back, but Julia had been beautiful. Alluring. And she’d been dressed that way, deliberately.

There was still no way he was going through with the marriage. His declaration on that had been, and still was, quite clear.

“She was indeed curious,” Uriah mused beside him.

Fraser sighed, looking up at his best friend. Cause that’s all that they were. Right?

“I meant everything that I said, and implied,” Uriah reiterated, that serious look on his face. Fraser felt himself blush as he quickly looked away.

“Thanks. For everything,” Fraser mumbled. He meant that too. He could feel Uriah’s smile at that. Just friends. Just best friends. That was all that there was to it. Nothing more at all.

Fraser stared at his arms. His scars had come out of that without any more bleeding too. With some of his reactions, he had been sure that they would have bled again, but all they were at the moment was just an angry red. He had... he had too many. He’d promised too, that he wouldn’t add any more, and he’d actually managed to hold to that. The pain from it had lessened somewhat, especially after he had started talking with Felicia, but was it ever truly gone? Julia had seen the scars, commented on them. But hadn’t been horrified. His parents had been though, the first time they’d seen them. Their reaction had been less than pleasant, and he no longer revealed his arms to them at all. To anyone, actually. Outside of home, it was always long sleeves, no matter the weather.

“They’re a part of you now. Always will be.”

Like he wanted Uriah to be.

Fraser internally groaned, his head a mess again. Why, why was he thinking all these things? Really, what was going on with him? Was he finally beginning to lose it? Was it even normal or healthy? It’s not like it wasn’t true, but... but... All those walls of denial, everything that he’d managed to keep bottled up, keep in check...

There was nothing wrong with wanting to stay friends with someone. That was natural. Uriah meant the world to him. Their friendship did. He’d never have managed to survive this long without him; his parents would have surely destroyed his soul long before now otherwise. But, was that it?

He’d kissed him... Cause he’d wanted to. Needed to.

Desired it. Desired him.

It felt so wrong. And so right. A cauldron of emotions, raging inside its depth.

But who was he, to want that? Who was he in the first place? Why did he not know who he was?

What had happened, that the real him had been sealed away so deep that he had lost the connection?

A shattered mirror, a thousand strangers staring back at him.

A shattered mirror, his parents screaming at him again, the fabric torn and shredded.

The bruises. The blood. The pain.

Tears flowing, hot, stinging his face.

He was crying again, his body wracked with sobs, his arms soaked with tears and blood, his magic surging near the surface. He could feel Uriah’s arms around him, strong, warm, comforting. He... he needed that. Fraser leant more into Uriah, just taking what was offered, and letting it all flow. Why? Why had he started crying again? That was twice in less than twenty-four hours. He barely cried at all. He was a man, for crying out loud. Okay, that was a bad analogy. He was certainly doing the latter already. Was he... was he even a man?

No, not going there. There was too much pain down that path, and he wasn’t like Felicia. He couldn’t be. They wouldn’t let him be.

His magic surged again, his hand in intense pain for a moment.

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Was even his magic telling him off? His magic that no longer listened to him, but seemed to be doing its own thing. It was still there, within him, doing whatever it did. He couldn’t deny that it was still influencing him, helping him, just not replying when it was called upon. He was certain that was part of the reason that he had the understanding of the language that he did. And boy, did it react at times. Like it was doing now.

“What’s happened to me, Uriah? Why am I such an emotional wreck?”

Another hug, the arms still remaining. “You’ve hit your limit, and you’re being pushed outside your comfort zone.”

Ouch. That was a bit harsh. And also completely true. Fraser grimaced.

“But, I’m here for you, Fraser. I always will be. No matter who you end up being. It’s going to be alright, no matter what your parents throw at you.”

Why had he added that extra bit? He’d done that last night as well, hadn’t he? It didn’t matter though. Not right now. What he’d just said, it was more than what he could have hoped for. It meant a lot. Just like Uriah did to him. It was reassuring. So much needed. Fraser turned his head and looked at Uriah. At his face that definitely needed a shave now, and his beautiful brown eyes, care and worry reflected deep within.

“Thanks. Really, thanks.” Fraser managed a half smile, and he could feel his magic settling again. The damage was done, his arms a mess again, but he was in no hurry to move right now. He just wanted to enjoy this moment, looking down at his hand as he stayed where he was. The tattoo had indeed changed, expanded, the lines starting to creep up his wrist, partially obscured by the blood. He still didn’t understand why it was doing that for him.

They stayed like that till Fraser’s phone beeped, a notification coming through from his parents. The dispatch instructions for the trip, and a summons for him to go and see them upon his return. That was unusual. He would have expected them to demand that he come and see them immediately, which he then would have tried to avoid for as long as possible till he eventually had no option but to do so. Which would have probably ended up being after the trip anyways. He hated the control that they still had over him, even though he’d left home. Even though he was an adult. But he was their child, a member of the Guardians, and he had been unable to start any form of life outside of that, no matter what he’d tried. They’d always put an end to it.

Perhaps he had Julia to thank for that? He doubted that they would have delayed the summons otherwise, given what had happened at the meal.

He gave the dispatch information a quick browse. He’d been right. They were leaving tomorrow, in the morning, heading to a small town called Resinfalls that was two days out from the city. The anomaly was a couple of hours outside of it, focused on a commune that had been abandoned for about the last decade or so. He remembered hearing about that one. Something sinister had been going on, and the authorities decided to take action and swooped in. What they had found hadn’t been pleasant at all, and little about that had actually been said, other than that everyone who was still alive had been taken away from there. As to what happened to them all, he had no idea. It had then kind of faded from everyone’s memories, the place remaining empty, slowly being taken over by nature. And it was that final aspect that made it suitable for an anomaly to appear there.

Anomalies were overlaps between the two realms. That much was fairly obvious, right from when the first one had appeared, well, to those with magic at least. While their existence could easily be sensed, some signs obvious, the actual changes only manifested during the tainted moon. But they weren’t permanent, existing for a time before whatever had bonded them together in the first place weakened and faded, and the location regained its sense of normality. Some were more obvious than others. An entire castle had appeared in one, though that had been a definite outlier, and it had been short-lived. The magic of the connection hadn’t been enough to sustain it for more than a couple of hours, and the Guardians had been too slow to even get a chance to look into it. Usually though it was a lot more subtle, changes to the vegetation and the appearance of a few stray buildings or other structures. Or even ruins.

Fraser was pretty sure that what were being classed as temporal spots and surges were also anomalies as well, just on the weaker side. Sure, the feel of them was different, and hence the classifications, but he was sure their underlying nature was the same. Places where magic could clearly be felt, and where the creatures also spawned, brought into being by the light of the tainted moon on the shadows of the world. Some were well known, and had existed for a decade or more, others were rather short-lived, spawning far too many creatures in one go, and then the magic just faded away as if it had never been there. It was just a blessing that there were never too many such locations in one go, restrained to some magical number. There were only so many spellswords, and he’d seen the results of what happened when one of the creatures managed to break through the wards that were usually set up around them. And felt it personally as well. The saving graces being that the tainted moon only manifested in certain areas, its frequency varying a lot between locations, and the creatures couldn’t exist outside of the tainted moon, no matter how much blood they’d drawn and absorbed.

Except for the one they’d seen last night. The one with Vampire. What had she been doing here, in the city? And why now, after all this time?

In reality, they didn’t know anything, did they? They were picking at the scraps that had been dropped from the other side. Deliberately perhaps?

If there was one thing that he was certain of, it was that the event that brought magic to their world had managed to form some form of connection between the two realms as well. He had been there, after all, even if he had only been five at the time. The connection was weak, volatile, but it was there, and likely the cause of the tainted moon. That bit was up for debate, but the arguments against it being the case were rather weak. There was also the theory, given the mentions of them in the tomes that had been found, that the creatures were a plague on the other side as well, but he wasn’t so sure on that. It just didn’t fit with what he knew, even given the cryptic warnings that had been deciphered.

Going back to Vampire though...

“Uriah...”

“Hmm?” It was rather pleasant, when Uriah made that sound. Soft and patient... His mind was wandering again...

“I think, that we won’t mention it. Vampire, and that creature. At least not yet. Something isn’t right about it all, that she was here.”

“You’re not still under her influence?” There was genuine worry there.

Fraser shook his head. “Not as far as I’m aware.” He hadn’t felt anything then, and still didn’t now. “She let us see her, Uriah. Know that she was there. If she wanted to hide her presence here, she could have just killed us. Or used some actual magic. She didn’t see us, or that knowledge, as a threat. Something else is going on...” He had enough of his own problems to worry about getting involved in anything else. And if he mentioned it, then he’d definitely end up being dragged before his parents. “At the very least, it can wait till after this trip.”

Uriah gave him a look, and then shrugged. “Fair enough. On the topic of the trip though, what are you going to wear? You can’t go looking like that.”

Uriah was one to speak, given how casually he dressed, but Fraser wasn’t going to complain about that. It was Uriah, his style, and he liked it on him. He looked good, and he could fight well in it too. The spellsword combat gear, not so much. Nor for him either. It wasn’t either of them, and it held bad memories. He’d long returned the serviceable parts of his and thrown out the rest. They were going in a VIP capacity anyways, so they could dress however they wanted.

“I think a little excursion of our own is in order,” Fraser declared, reluctantly extracting himself from Uriah’s arms. He also wanted to go see Felicia as well. He just needed to survive the first part.