Chapter 23: Chapter 21: Flower of Hell I

Ah, it rained after all…” I uttered as a full-on rain shower continued outside of the shopping center. “This is a problem…”

“Should we wait for the rain to go out?” Erica asked as she put down the plastic bags she held filled with her groceries. “My mom’s at work so I can’t ask her to pick us up.”

“Could you check what is it?” I asked.

“Sure,” Erica replied as she pulled out her phone from her pocket and lit it open. “It’s 4:39 PM.”

“It’s getting late… if we wait for the rain to go out, I don’t know if it’ll stop before dark,” I mentioned. “I think I’ll call for my mom to pick us up instead.”

“Got it.”

In the next moment I put down my plastic bags as well and pulled out my phone, with a few taps I called my mom who I assumed was home.

After letting the phone dial, hers for a little while, she didn’t pick up, “Hm…” I uttered as I placed my phone back into my pocket.

Thinking that she’d probably call me back once she saw the notification.

“She didn’t pick up,” I said as I turned to Erica.

“What should we do?”

“I guess all we can do for now is wait till the rain stops,” I replied glancing outside the glass door. In the next moment I picked up all the plastic bags that I was holding, “Do you want to get a seat somewhere?”

“Sure… but I’m kind of getting hungry.”

“Ah… then, do you want to eat somewhere while we’re here?”

“Let’s go to the food court, there’s plenty of seats there.”

“Alright…”

 

And with that, we both made our way to the food court.

 

***

“That was delicious…” Erica uttered as we both side by side on the side walked, walking home to our neighborhood.

“Uh, yeah…” I replied awkwardly.

After getting a bite together at the food court, the rain had stopped ten minutes after we had finished eating at around 5:27 PM in the afternoon, just as the sun was about to start setting.

Of course, barely any conversation was being exchanged between the both of us as we quietly walked trying to not make atmosphere even more awkward than it already is.

Maybe… I should just stop.

I can’t exchange other people’s lives just for me and her to be happy together.

I should probably give up.

If I continue to be even more selfish than this, then… I’d be no different.

 

To the old me I hated, I’d be no different from that selfish prick.

The me who always hurt everyone, the me who was all to selfish, the me who was a spoiled brat.

A self-centered idiot.

 

I can’t get rid of him…

I can’t completely change because he’s still here.

 

Should I end it all?

 

I know people would become sad because I died and took my own life but… I’m sure it’ll be better for them in the long run if I just disappeared.

If I continue to stay, it won’t be good.

I’ll end up ruining more lives than I already had.

 

I deserve it… I completely, and entirely deserve to d̵̨̡̹̣̥̘̰̠̱̪̣̮̱̂͂į̵̤̪͖͚̤̫̩̝͈̝̬͇́̈̌̍͜e̶͕̬̣̟̬͙̟̝̻͋̄̚.̴͔͔̞̹̰̞̊͛̾̅͠ ̷̧̧̲͍͙͈̞̖͇̺̭̙̏͛̂̑̀͆̈́̽

 

***

“See you later, Iven.”

“Yeah, see you later.”

After reaching our neighborhood and setting down her groceries on her front porch while I continued to carry mine, we parted ways as she went inside her house, carrying the groceries with her.

“…” I sighed.

I wasn’t planning on spending the rest of my afternoon with her.

I really didn’t plan on spending it with her of all people.

 

Maybe… it’s just fate’s way of tormenting me. I thought as I stopped glancing back at her house and went inside my own house.

 

***

After sorting out the unplanned groceries on the first floor, putting where everything needs to be.

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I went up to my room along with the stuff I had bought from the hardware store.

I obviously couldn’t just leave lying around in the first floor when my parents would ask me why I bought them and what I’d use them for when they see it.

 

Although since my room has no locks, my parents could walk in anytime and see the plastic bag so I’d need to hide it in a place where they can’t see it when they walk in the room.

 

After much deliberation, I hid it under my bed because I really had no other choice with a room cramped as mine.

Of course, the chance of my mom finding it under my bed is still high as she comes in to clean my room every two weeks and the last time she cleaned it was nearly two weeks ago so I’d have to take it out and hide it somewhere else the day before she cleans my room.

 

Which is in about three days.

 

“Ah, now that I think about it… that’s really bad,” I uttered loudly as I dropped on my bed.

 

Taking it out of the house was not option.

Even if I sneak it past my parents, one of my neighbors’ might see me carrying it out and question me.

It’s essentially trapped in my house until the time comes for when I have to use it.

 

And for me to use it, I’d need to…

 

I’d need to…

 

Î̴̛̮̩̜̲̖͈̲̈̄̆̾̎́̀͆̂͘ ̸͇̣̞̯̲̣̙̳̓̈́̄̔̒̏͒̽͒̍͜͠n̵̳̤̖͔̫͎̼̩͎͔̼͙̋̒͊́̅̉͌̂́̊̑̊̚͝ě̶̛̻̙̻̮̗̻̟̲̩͇̣͙̐̍́̈́̽̓̿̇͆̇͝ȩ̵̫̙̣̱̺͕͙̞͈̙̓͌̄̅̀͒͘d̴̡̛̠̘͔̠͎̿͗̔͒̊͛̋͒͂̓̕̕͘ ̸̨̛̲͙̰̹͚͍̘̽̉̈́̈͑̂̄͠͠ț̶͇͎̥̝̝̳̠̑͗̓̅͆̀̓̇ǫ̶̨̧̡͓̮̺͎͚̝̣̫̭̗̾̑̋̒̔͒̍͒́̚͝ ̴̰̖̤͙̱̭́́̚k̵̻͎̘̙̙̫̩͓̄̚i̵͔̱͕̓̀͗͌̚͝ḻ̸͎͕̦̲̘̎l̵͍̪̂́̈́̿̈́̂͂͛̈́̏̚͘͝ ̴̡̢̩̳̙̬͈̖͈͛̓̀̆̐̏̋̅̆͂̍̂͘͜͝ṡ̵͖̣̠͈̙͈ͅợ̷͓̟͚̘͇̇̀̓̊͗̈́̓̋̂̆̑͝m̶̫̘̜̺̪̹̟̣̗̄̈́e̴̡̮̫̙͍̹̖̬͓̠̊̆͐ͅb̶̧̢̦̬̪͕̗͎̆̿͆̌̅̓̓̎̾̓̊͜͠͝͝o̶̤̺̻̘͙͔͂̃͊̂̿̊͗̍̅̾̚ḑ̶̧̨̬̙̺͍̤͍̝̗͒̊͜y̴̨̨̨̰̝̣̪̯͚̬͕͙̓ͅ ̸̛͎̮̱͚̺̏̃̑̿̈́͂̏̃̿̀̃͌̚͝f̷̪̋̃ị̴̢̨̖͕̞̠̆̑̅̔̾͒̎r̴̗͈͖̣͓̬̒̎͗̓͛͐̅͝s̷̢͕̖͈̙̬̼̣͈̻͙̠̣̞̞̉̈́̈́́̌̇̉̈̿̊̑͂̔t̸̮̜͈͌̉̓̈́͋̓́͑̂̚.̴̭͈̯̰͓̯̗̜̝͔̇̂̀̈̃͑̈̏́̀͛̒̏̍͘.̵̧̧͔̟̯̪̲̣̇̔.̴̟͊̉͆͋̓̃̀́̑ ̶̙̖̠̩̟̣̘̦͔̯͕̰͊̊͂̂̍̈́͛̇̉̈́̃̇̒̓̕

 

***

 

“It’s time…” I uttered as I glanced at my phone screen.

 

On the screen was my direct messages with Erica.

After thinking and thinking on how I should proceed with something as immoral as this, I… came up with something.

 

The plan to commit a murder in the most possible way.

My brain wasn’t equipped to think of something like a ‘perfect murder’ where no one will suspect a thing but… it’s a plan where I can kill her and return to my original timeline.

 

The world where I was happy with her…

 

With my level of intelligence, I figured that with a bit of manipulating, I could get her to invite me to her room and kill her there.

After killing her, I’d need to dismantle her corpse as quickly as I can, throw it in the garbage bin and run.

I don’t have a place to run to but I figured the moment I kill her, I’d just need to run as fast as I could to lessen any traces that I could leave behind.

 

With the message I received just now from her, I had already successfully manipulated her into inviting me to her room under the pretext of checking it out because she already checked out mine.

 

It’s unbelievable how easy it is to manipulate her.

 

And for that, I feel bad.

 

I’m only human, so there’s no way I couldn’t feel guilty for being overly selfish like this.

I don’t know whether Lilith would return me back to my original world and I could be making a very horrible mistake here.

But if I don’t take this chance now when I’d already taken the first steps.

I’m only going to add more regrets and guilt to my already heavy heart.

 

So, there’s no turning back.

 

I have to do this…

 

Whatever it takes to get it back…

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