Chapter 4: Chapter 4: Temptation of The Forbidden Fruit

“…n..!”  

“Mngh…”

“…en…!”

“Ugh… shut… up.” 

“Iven!”

At that moment, my eyes shot awake, only to see a familiar face filling up my field of view. “…A-Alisa…?” I uttered her name as my brain started up. 

“Woah, Woah, Woah…!” The next moment, I widened my eyes as Alisa’s face was close to mine as if both mine and she were already touching. 

“Ouch!” I tried backing up because her face was close, but I hit my head on the white wall causing a big clang. 

“You okay…? And awake?” Alisa asked as she straightened up as she was leaning towards my face before. 

“Ouch… I’m fine; your face was just too close….” 

“Oh, was it?” 

“Yeah…” 

I scratched my eyes for a bit, and seeing it clearly now, Alisa was standing beside my bed. She was wearing a white jacket with some wool embedded in it, along with plain black pants.

Instead of the usual ponytail hairstyle, I’m used to seeing every day at school, Alisa had her shoulder-length black hair down. “…Why are you in my room?” 

“Tita asked me to wake you up for dinner.” 

“Oh, she did… What time is it now?” 

“It’s somewhere around 6:30, I think.” 

“Well… okay, uh… just let me go to the toilet really quick and I’ll head down for dinner.” 

“Great, and nice room you have here. The last time I’ve been in here was when you were still setting things up so yeah it looks nicer than before,” Alisa voiced as she quickly glanced at the entirety of my room. 

“Thanks, I guess….” 

My room isn’t really all that special; the only things inside are my single king-sized bed, a 55” inch smart TV, a desktop setup right next to the TV, and one tall bookshelf with six layers next to the TV.

To other people, they might say I’m downplaying it, but the reality is that it’s nothing special. 

***

After a quick trip to the bathroom, I headed downstairs, to which Alisa had gone down first because I told her to. 

“Hm? Where’s everyone?” I uttered as I noticed the first floor of my house was empty. 

“They’re all outside,” Alisa replied as she entered my field of view. 

“Oh…” 

Her answer makes a lot of sense, as I hear several cheerful voices from outside the house. 

Before I went to the kitchen counter, I quickly looked through the window in my living room. I saw that my parents, aunts, uncles, and a bunch of our other neighbours were having a drinking party around a bonfire.

In contrast, I saw some of my other cousins playing basketball. 

Aside from my cousins and other aunts and uncles, this was a sight I’d usually see every weekend. 

“Shouldn’t you go out and play with them?” I said as I turned to Alisa, who walked right up behind me while I was looking. 

“That’s supposed to be my line.” 

“…I… I’m not going to go out, I’m tired.” 

“Even though you just slept?” 

“Yeah…” 

The next moment, I walked past Alisa and looked at what was on the kitchen counter. There already seem to be two plates filled with food. 

“You’re going to eat with me?” I asked as it was the only possible conclusion I could think of. 

“I am, I wanted to talk to you too so… I told them I’d wait for you.” 

“Okay…” 

***

“So? What did you want to talk about?” 

“It’s about the thing I told you earlier….” 

After we got settled into our seats, we both started eating together as we sat opposite each other. 

“I see… so what about it?” 

“I want your help on this….” 

“Oh…huh? What?” 

“I want your help because I want to figure out why my face feels flushed or my heart beats so fast whenever I think about you….” 

“My help… but what can I do?” 

“We’ll think up stuff together, two heads are better than one, right?” 

“Yeah, usually but now that you’re saying it, I can’t think of anything else either.” 

“Oh…” 

This is a huge problem… I’m starting to think that Devil lied to me about my eyes which IS something I shouldn’t even be surprised about, but I still am. 

Ah… I’m starting to regret it. 

Why did I even do that to her? Why did I keep being so damn S̸̨̨̖͓̬͈̯̊̎̔̽̚e̵͙̥͚̾̍̌̂͒̒́̚l̵̡͔̘͖̥̯̺̊͌̈̒͒̓̈́̕f̵̛͍͖̜̼̭̭͋̄͊̀͜i̶͕͚͒̈̀̔̒̃s̵̪͓͕̫̩̈̔̆̅́̂͐͝ĥ̵̛͙͖͚̼̲͎͙͙̀̇͑? I just wanted to be happy… that was all. But maybe I’m wrong… maybe… I made the wrong choice. 

"You… okay? You started to space out for a bit there,” Alisa mentioned.

“Oh, uh yeah, I’m fine… I still feel a little tired that’s all.”

I’m happy she’s starting to think that way about me, but… this is wrong. This is wrong, this is wrong, this is wrong, this is wrong…!

“Oh, you’re done?” I asked as I noticed her plate emptied. 

“Ah yeah, I’m done, I’ll go put this in the sink.” 

“Yeah…” 

This is a problem that I started… so that’s why I need to fix it. Alisa shouldn’t be allowed to love someone like me. Nobody should… 

Transferring to a new school, moving overseas, and settling in a new home had left my mind beaten and battered, leading to me making questionable decisions such as accepting the Devil’s offer. 

I wanted to be happy; I wanted to be loved and accept it wholeheartedly. 

I realized it once more. A person like me shouldn’t exist. 

 

My existence ĥ̵̡̢̨͇͔̗͓͎͕̥̫̠͙̤̹̰̠͎͗u̴̙̯̳̽̿̚ŗ̸̧̬͍̭͍̱͇̱̞̰̪̥̲͋̾̓̒͐t̶̡̝̝̹̗̲̹̱͎͆̿́̏̓͊̍̉̃̌͐̑̋̾̀̕͝͠͠š̸̨̳̳͈̬͙̫̼̯̝̽̆͋̄͝ ̶͓̩̼͙̯͑̃͋́͌͗̑̕p̸̡̢͉͎̻̭̥͉̻͓͖̳̯̻̳̲̃̆͗̓̎̓͊̀͘͠e̷̡̧̟͉̪͍͉̩̪͎̻͉̝̿̌͛̀̀̃͌̋̅̊̆́̍̆̽̚̕̕͜͝͝ọ̸̧͓̠̻͇̜͍͠p̴̨̧̛̝͔̼͂̃́̒͌̿̏̈́͜l̴̡̨̤̱͎̤̲͍̱̭̤͉̯̳̟͇̜̞̻̇̿̇͐̀̅̈́̀̉̏͆͠e̷̤̥̤̰͇͓̲͙̬͇̩͚̋͛̂ͅ.̸͍̼͌͋͐̌̓̓̽̏̈̕ͅ

 

That’s why I can’t forgive myself, nor do I have any right to ask to be noticed by others. 

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But… 

Now that she’s become like this… 

It’s okay, right? 

If I fix it in the end… 

I want to be allowed the privilege of accepting her love, if only for a short time. 

I’ll at least try to become normal during that time. 

***

“Haah…” I sighed as I felt the gentle cold breeze of the winter night touch my skin. “Why am I here…?” I muttered to myself. 

“Enjoy it, you don’t go out very much so every once in a while, is fine, right?” Alisa chimed in as she stood next to me. 

“Well… I guess,” I added. 

After we both finished eating dinner, I washed the dishes and then Alisa invited me to go outside, which I… reluctantly accepted since it’s a bit livelier here than usual. 

“Hm?” 

“Hey, Iven play basketball with us,” A boy with short black hair and black eyes, wearing a plain blue hoodie and grey jogging pants, said.

This was Raedan, one of my cousins and one that I met during the two times I visited this country for vacation. 

“No thanks, I’m fine watching from here….” I replied. 

Now that I think about it… I’m sure he’s surprised at how much I’ve changed. The sociable idiotic boy he once knew now turned out to be this gloomy person. 

But I don’t think he noticed, at least on the surface. 

“Oh, okay…” Raedan responded as he turned to Alisa. “Do you want to play with us too Alisa?” 

“No, I think I’ll also just watch you guys play from here with Iven, I already played earlier so yeah,” Alisa voiced. 

“If you say so…” Raedan ran off to join the rest of our cousins and the neighbours’ kids. 

“Hm…” I loudly uttered. 

“What is it?” Alisa asked. 

“I thought you were going to convince me to join them.” 

“Why?” 

“No particular reason, I just had feeling you would.” 

“You don’t actually want to play right?” 

“Yeah, I don’t.” 

“See, I knew you actually don’t want to, so I kept quiet.” 

“Alright… but aren’t you going to play? You like that kind of thing, right?” 

“True, I do like playing basketball and being active and all that but… I’m kind of feeling tired as well.” 

“Hm…” I glanced at her for a moment and saw her not smiling brightly like she always does whenever I see her. 

It’s as if she’s thinking about something hard. 

Something hard enough to make that bubbly smile of hers vanishes. 

As Alisa and I watched our cousins and a couple of other kids play basketball, I thought. Maybe… I’m being too pretentious because I’m reading into it too much. 

There’s no evidence that Alisa’s falling for me romantically; I hope it’s just a cold or something similar.

 

“Hey… do you have a dream?” Alisa suddenly asked as the fire suddenly flamed up for a moment. 

“Dream?” I uttered in confusion as I glanced at her. 

“You know, a goal for the future, something you really want to do?” 

“Hm… I, don’t have one.” 

“You don’t have one?” 

“Yeah, I don’t have one.” 

Dreams… I think I used to have them as a kid, but right now, I don’t know what I want to do in the future. 

Futures, Dreams… when I realized how much of a spoiled brat I was, I threw all those away because I thought I wouldn’t have one anymore… 

I thought it’d be useless to even have them in the first place. 

“How about you? Do you have any dreams?” I asked the question back. 

“Me…? Well… I guess do have one.” 

“What is it?” 

“It’s a secret.” 

“Oh… I see.” 

“But I guess I’ll eventually tell you someday.”

“Because ****** my dream after all.” Alisa softly muttered. 

“Huh? What’d you say?” 

“Nothing…!” Alisa cheekily voiced as she turned towards me with a mischievous smile. 

“Urk.” 

Cute…. I thought. 

“Well, anyways, I’m going to achieve my dream whatever it takes,” Alisa said as she clenched her right fist as if she was showing determination. 

That’s nice… I wish I could be that motivated about something… 

“Alisa…! We’re going home….” My aunt shouted. 

“Ah, I’m coming…!” Alisa shouted back in response, “Well that’s that I guess…, see you on Thursday!” 

In the next moment, Alisa ran off towards her parents as she flashed me one last bright smile as intensely waved goodbye. 

“Haa…” I sighed. 

 

It’s a free trial period, right? I might as well make use of it.

If I don’t accept the Devil’s offer at this end, I’m sure…

 

Everything is going to go back to normal… 

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