Chapter 43: Ice queen. Plague on a wolf’s thoughts

With Circe bringing the subject back to the wolf incident, Edward pointed towards the skills part on his status tablet and said: “I’ve also gained a new skill after unlocking my shape-shifter class, Wolf Form. As I was returning from the dungeon, I used my wolf form to return faster and, as I was approaching the city, I was attacked by a flying type magic beast….”

Edward continued telling Circe the story as he heard it from Mya, explaining Minx’s evolved form, her ice magic and even her ability to speak. Circe, surprisingly, got very excited as she heard the story and, by the end of it, stood up and said: “Come on. You’re showing me that magic beast.”

“What? Now?” asked Edward, taken by surprise by Circe’s sudden excitement.

Circe didn’t leave any room for arguments as she practically dragged Edward out of the magic tower and made him lead her towards Minx’s hiding spot. As the two of them were walking through the city, heading towards the gate, Edward said: “Master, you once told me to be careful in dealing with the Swarm…”

Circe turned to look at her disciple and, seeing the fury burning in his eyes, asked: “Did something happen with them again?”

Edward nodded, not elaborating on the subject, prompting Circe to continue: “If you really need some help, I’ll take you later to meet someone. They know a lot more than I do and might be able to help.”

Edward looked at the sky and noticed that there was not a lot of time left until the evening, prompting him to say: “I probably won’t be able to. I have a meeting with the adventurer guild master in the evening, remember?”

Circe also looked up at the sky to check on the time and sighed: “If you stand against them you will probably not even know how you died…”

“I just want to go after some thugs that hurt someone I care about. It’s not like I want to take down the whole organization…”

“Even so…” said Circe with a pensive look, “Going against them will not end up good for you. Can’t you just let it go?”

“I can’t… the moment I saw those bruises… her crying… the fear in her eyes… I can’t let it go, master…” said Edward absentmindedly, feeling he owed Violet, more so after scaring her himself. He wanted to make it up to her, he wanted to punish someone for her pain, while also venting his own failures. A lot of built up anger was brewing inside him, threatening to explode at any moment.

Circe saw the changing emotions on Edward’s face and felt a sense of kinship towards him, memories of her past coming back to her. Sighing once again, she said: “I won’t be able to help you with them, but if you really get in trouble, come and hide at the magic tower. As strong as they are, they won’t dare attack someone inside the guild.”

Edward also turned towards Circe and saw something he never through he would ever see on his master’s face, a trace of fear.

“Master, is the Swarm really that strong?”

Circe nodded, “They are. Probably not the people who you plan on going against, but the ones in charge, the higher ups of the dark guilds, each and every one of them is a monster on itself…”

Edward could tell Circe had some history with the Swarm herself and asked: “Master, did you also fight them at some point?”

“Fight?” mumbled Circe, looking at the clear sky high above with a pensive look, “I guess you could call it that…”

“Can you tell me what happened?” asked Edward, a bit curious about his master’s past, but Circe just shook her head and said: “Maybe another time… we’re almost at the gate.”

Edward sighed seeing Circe deflecting but didn’t say anything and nodded to show his agreement. The two of them passed through the guards at the gate and Edward led Circe towards Minx’s hiding place.

As they got close, Minx came up before them to greet Edward and fixed her eyes on Circe, not recognizing her at all. Circe also immediately fixed her eyes at the majestic three feet long blueish wolf.

Edward wanted to introduce them, but seeing they were both just staring at one another, he decided to wait some more.

Circe knew from Edward that the wolf could speak and, after waiting for some time, she asked: “Minx, right? Do you mind if I get a bit closer?”

Minx stared for a second more without saying a word before a string of mana drifted out of her body, fused with the wind and a young girl’s voice sounded in Circe’s ear.

“Alright.”

Circe smiled once she heard the wolf speak and approached her. Moving her hand through it’s soft fur, she exclaimed: “You’re beautiful…”

Minx looked confused by Circe’s words and turned towards Edward while tilting her head. This reminded Edward of when they first met and she wouldn’t understand him, causing Edward to chuckle as he said: “Minx this is my master, Circe. She said she likes you.”

Minx seemed happy and started wiggling her tail as she rubbed her head against Circe’s palm, causing the smile on her face to grow even wider.

Rubbing her head softly, Circe asked: “Minx, do you mind showing me your magic?”

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Minx looked at Edward for permission and, seeing him nod in agreement, took a step back as her white eyes started shinning and the fur all over her body started swaying gently. Shortly after, a gust of cold wind blew around her with ice droplets forming out of thin air.

Edward watched to the side with a slightly mesmerized expression on his face. It was the first time he saw Minx’s magic as well. The wind blew Circe’s mage hat away, leaving her long hair to sway wildly. She raised her face upwards and closed her eyes, basking in the pleasure of frost mana drifting around her as she joined Minx and released her own mana as well.

A small ice tornado soon surrounded them, making Circe look like an ice queen in Edward’s eyes. Eventually, they both stopped at the same time and Minx exclaimed first: “Cold. Minx likes it.”

Circe smiled and waved her hand towards her hat that was laying on the frozen grass, not that far from her. The hat flew above her head and she said towards Minx: “Thanks Minx. Don’t you want to be my beast companion?”

Edward raised an eyebrow at his master’s shameless poaching attempt but luckily Minx had his back and immediately said: “Minx likes Circe, but Minx likes Edward more.”

Circe didn’t seem offended but smiled instead and said to Edward: “Let’s head back.”

Edward nodded and they said their goodbyes to Minx before heading back towards the city. On the way, Edward gave Circe a weird look and asked: “What was that about? Did you want to see Minx just to try and poach her from me?”

Circe shrugged and said: “I had to try. Even if still relatively weak, she is still a frost magic beast will bring a huge boost to my fighting strength, but that’s not the reason I wanted to see her.”

“Then why?” asked Edward, not really understanding what was in his master’s head.

“I was curious about something” replied Circe, not willing to speak more about the subject no matter how Edward insisted.

As they were chatting, they passed through the gate and Circe said: “I’m going back to the tower. I won’t restrict you, but you must really spend some more time learning new spells. If you come before me like today one more time, I’ll actually throw you out of the guild. Understood?”

Edward nodded and watched as Circe started walking back towards the magician guild. Being free from his master, Edward took a deep breath and started heading towards Ingvar’s house in the residential district. It was not that late in the evening, but he wanted to quickly get it over with and focus on searching for the ones who hurt Violet.

As he walked through the streets crowded with people returning home for the evening, Edward’s mind was drifted to the recent events. It was like a heavy stone was pressing on his heart, making him feel suffocated. He didn’t know if Violet will be able to look at him again without fear in her eyes, if he would be able to obtain permission to get Minx into the city, if he would be able to deal with the Swarm.

As his mind asked itself million questions, Edward massaged the bite mark on his arm and muttered: “Fenrir, you know, this world is nothing like I imagined it would be when you first brought me here. A world of fantasy, magic, demi-humans, dungeons, gods… I never imagined I would end up feeling just as trapped and suffocated as I did back on Earth…”

The people he passed by, hearing Edward speak to himself were giving him weird looks, but he didn’t even seem to notice or care as he continued: “I guess, life is never easy, is it? Sigh, when I think back to the time I arrived here, how I imagined I would end up sleeping with sexy mystical girls and have fun killing monsters and growing stronger… what a naïve idiot I’ve been…”

“It’s mostly been death and gore and pain and suffering… I keep stumbling over my own feet, getting saved by others, sometimes ending up with them even getting injured to bail out my idiotic ass, just like Minx did. Violet offered me a home when I had none, what did I ever do to pay her back? A couple of silvers that were not even mine to begin with? Terrifying her to death by turning into a monster in front of her and then leaving? Maybe I really am the trash they always said I was, just a worthless trash… I’m sorry you had to get stuck with me, Fenrir…” apologized Edward as he lifted his eyes to look at the sky, tears falling silently down his cheeks as memories of his life back on earth played through his mind like an old bad movie.

Fenrir, who stayed silent all this while, finally said: [You think you are the only one who makes mistakes? Have you wondered how I managed to lose to Vidar when I was strong enough to kill and devour his father, the king of gods, Odin?]

Hearing Fenrir’s question, Edward pondered for a moment before shaking his head and waiting for her to continue.

[After the horrible war at the end was over, and Odin was devoured by me, absorbing all his power drove me mad, a madness brought about by power. In my madness, I turned my fangs towards the only being that will be able to satisfy it, the mother tree. No one of my allies was able to stop me and, eventually, I reached the heart of the tree and buried my fangs in it’s core.]

[ I severely overestimated myself, and what happened next was my punishment. The mother tree used it’s own power to bind me, but it’s power was not enough to do anything else besides that, so I thought I was still safe until I will eventually be able to overpower it. Scared of me actually succeeding in my crazed frenzy, the mother tree made a deal with Vidar and let him borrow her strength to use it against me. That is how I ended up having my body destroyed and soul cursed for all eternity. It would have been a fitting punishment and a just end for me, since I deserved it, but Vidar took it one step further and started washing his grief of losing his father on all the living beings of the nine words.]

It was the first time Edward has heard of this and could feel the strong regret present in Fenrir’s voice as she recounted her past, causing him to mumble: “Maybe that’s one other things that brought us together, our ability to somehow screw everything up…”

[Maybe, but I’m not willing to give up until I repay my mistake and end Vidar’s reign of terror over Yggdrasil.. We might screw up from time to time, both you and I, but if we give up, if we resign ourself to wallowing in self pity, I think it would be an even greater screw up..]

“I know, and it’s easy to say it, but the pain and the stifling feeling won’t go away so easily…”

[It’s been with me for more years than I can count and has not gone away yet.. You can only learn to live with it and fight to fix your mistakes.. There is no going back, only moving forward…]

“There is no going back, only moving forward…” muttered Edward as he passed by Ingvar’s house and continued strolling for a while longer to clear his mind.

Unaware to Edward, on one of the highest tree’s branches, someone was watching him as he passed by. She pulled one of the strings of her white bow as her long pointy ears trembled gently and she mumbled: “There is no going back, only moving forward…”

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