Chapter 4: Chapter 4: Raise Your Glass

There was no one waiting at the airport for Mr. Blair it was really the first time that Tony was truly alone. Usually he was followed by bodyguards but from the last two days he had concluded that he had enough secrets which with an entourage had a high-risk of exposure, because a human was a social animal shackled by the thoughts of sympathy and conscience, these blind men and women could not see the real world which at least according to Mr. Blair was infested with creatures of dark. Vampires, werewolves and the Bigfoot were like cherry on top of a humongous horror cake. Mr. Blair had already hunted down a vampire in Maryland but now he was in a different part of the world where finding a creature of the dark was as impossible as spotting a man or woman of virtue not corrupted by the enticing world of the internet nor charmed by the foolish words of devils.

Jin Fugui was waiting for the next flight to Dallas, he was trying to find a book nerd at the airport with whom he could've had a heart to heart talk about the demand of translators being more high than the suppliers. Jin Fugui indeed saw Mr. Blair but the strange man was standing like a statue near an elevator. If their fate was entwined they would soon meet again 'cause the world was truly a small space as us humans were too far from the space age.

Mr. Blair this time rented a car, as he wanted to avoid having a chat with a stranger, and he also wanted to take the reigns of his life back in his hands. First he stopped at a Mobile store from there he bought a new smartphone along with a premium data plan. Satisfied, Mr. Blair opened the doors of his rented car, and he hopped straight to an hip-hop channel on the stereo. Tony matched the beats of a popular rap song with bobbing his head back and forth, his forehead almost pecked the black steering wheel. All of a sudden his newly bought smartphone pinged with a notification. "You have two and half days of life remaining, because by the end of the third day I'll erase you from this planet."

"Yeah if you wanna erase something, erase your own dick asshole." Mr. Blair replied to the anonymous sender. Tony didn't even give the unknown guy or gal a chance he just blocked the number, and he switched off his smartphone. Finding an acquaintance in a foreign land's hard for some people but for Tony it was easy as eating pie 'cause his Uncle Ben had spread his speed to every nook and cranny of America, and if the rumours are true his uncle had way too many bastards in Central Europe. Tony stopped the Benz at a video-rental store. And he met his seventeenth cousin, Ezekiel... Zeke for his good friends. Zeke was a busy man he was always moving in the store lending a helping hand to every other girl until he found a new and better You... Zeke was a widower, his lovely wife Hannah couldn't handle the pain of delivering, two open-minded girls to a serial killer for a photoshoot.

"Tony... you're back. Weren't you in Barcelona funding the separatists?" A puzzled Zeke asked Tony after he read a post about Tony on Twitter. "That's fake news I'm not dumb enough to fund separatists in the current political climate of the right-wingers." Tony

Tony explained to Zeke what he had done in the last few weeks. But he especially avoided talking about Aza because she was a woman of no importance. She was dead. And dead don't matter to the living.

"So you're avoiding a girl." Zeke said happily after he had listened the whole weekend story like a summary. "You should've called. I could've picked you at the airport."

"I don't wanna trouble a good friend." Tony answered. "In fact what you could really help me with is finding a private eye. I want to investigate some things, company business. And I need a investigator who's good and hardboiled enough to not be scared by 'em coppers."

"There's over ten thousand private eyes in this city, some are amateurs while others are professionals but among the best is Fugui... Mr. Jin Fugui from Chengdu." Zeke said.

"Does he have a scar on his left cheek?" Tony prodded

"Indeed. You must have seen one of his photos. That case... hmm... yeah during the Ailee Summers case he tracked down a group of child traffickers, one of them got him good, and the child trafficker left a scar that no plastic surgeon on earth could hide, even the one with godly skills in North Korea..."

"What a tragedy..." Tony said "Well I met that man during the rush hour but he was certainly not a detective he was more like a nerd from literature club, what can he even do with his stickman like body, he isn't hard-boiled enough to be a Top Detective?"

Zeke shrugged his shoulder, and before droning on like a true fan of a celebrity dancing on the other side of the screen Zeke was ready to defend his Detective Idol, he waited for a while to build-up the mood. "He knows Kung-Fu..." Here he paused "... Real Kung-Fu not like the ones they do in movies, he once defeated over a hundred men on Chatham street. Don't judge him by his looks. I dare say that he can even assassinate the director of CIA."

"Well you're a fan... Is this your post BTS phase?"

"I never retired from the Army... I took a break just like my idols. Please stay on topic, we were talking about the Great detective. You know even the Presidential secret service hired him from a mission..."

"President? President of United States asked for that crazy guy?" A shocked Tony asked.

"No --- President of Umbrella Corporation but he's even more important than the President Booker T. Washingtion because the former's a kingmaker. Four years ago he manipulated every youth and lady of this great country, our previous president Rico Sanchez was elected by his efforts. You don't know Rico? Brother you even voted for him in the last election, he's that guy who was famous for his Riconic style of relationship, although the Riconic style didn't become popular now but I can say with the end of prudes this syle would  surely become popular."

"Yeah your detective's great even better than Sherlock Holmes." Tony said sarcastically. "But he's at the airport waiting to catch another flight... by the time he gets back, I would be at another side of the world. So dial back that fan persona a little and this time tell me about someone who's just your average Joe, a regular guy with no strange quirks."

"Wait for a sec, I got his number." Zeke said.

"No need to do that. You are already talking to him... don't set up an appointment. Listen to what I'm saying, I don't want to meet that guy again."

"Don't be a sourpuss, at least meet the guy when he's being a professional, first opinions of geniuses are always crappy."

Zeke gave four slices of a Cheese Pizza to Tony. And food shut him up quite fast. While Zeke was stacking the movies on the large shelves, Tony was playing the pre-installed Candy Crush on his phone. And by the time Zeke was finished with his chore Tony was already out of lives in Candy Crush.

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"It looks like you don't have nothing better to do, so why not watch a movie. Man... you're in a video store. Pick any movie you like and just watch it, Detective Jin Fugui will be here within an hour and half, I'll order a takeout for you, just concentrate on the movie."

"I don't get this movie." Tony said "Why are these machines chasing after that brunette just because she's gonna give birth to a prophet, this movie doesn't make a lot of sense. I mean if you're machine, you can just wipe out the whole plant... why chase after a girl whom you'll never catch because of plot protection society."

"The Chase won an academy award." Zeke replied, "This movie you're watching is not about fights it's about the interaction between humans and machines which finally leads to a better world. The romance between a machine and a woman sparked a new debate, and some girl in Louisiana even registered a marriage with HAL 1000."

"Who even rents these kind of movies. Men like us need some action, if I want to see a couple kissing I'll just watch porn. Romance's dull you can see the tidbits of it in every diner, park, restaurant and even at a courthouse people are making out, get rid of romance to make your store great again."

"Chicks dig romantic movies. As long as they exist I'm not stupid enough to get rid half of my business. And speaking of adult movie stars they don't even know how to act, so how can you say porn and romantic movies are the same... you're just trying to defame romance because your wife forced you to watch 'The Notebook' every other week."

"Don't be a Gaylord. Give me an action movie, pretty please?"

"So you just skipped over the entire thing about the Notebook... why do you always avoid talking about Hannah? I admit she had a certain fixation on the movies she liked but all in all she was a 'Good Girl', her death has a rating of 9.7 on USDD (United States Death Database)."

"I know you want to keep her alive in your memories... but all I want to do's to forget everything about her..."

"You have a real weird way of grieving for a person you loved all your life. Are you Human?"

"Yes. I have a dick, I have a throat, and I own a lot of coats which I don't even know from where I had bought, I carry condoms in my wallet, so I never miss the things that I don't want to miss. I commit over a hundred mistakes every day, I avoid old people like plauge because they have a mist of death and dread all over their body. Sometimes I even write shittposts on 2Chan in German language, I argue with every Irish fella I meet in a bar, and I avoid every woman over 30 from Texas. I'm through and through a human being with lots of fault and not a single redeeming quality."

"So you were that idiot those Japanese guys were making fun on youtube!! Tony, you're a legend in Japan."

Tony was too engrossed with the opening scene of a new movie, he paid very little attention to Zeke's words. In the starting scene of the movie, the hero of the movie was jumping from Eiffel Tower to save the love of his life from committing suicide. Why the heroine wanted to end her life that was of no importance 'cause she was just a plot device used to shine the light of a saviour on the hero. "You said something about Japan and shittposts." Tony asked. "I didn't do anything great man, I just translated some lame jokes into German, and then I posted them on 2Chan to ruin the browsing experience of internet crawlers. Why I did that? I saw a bucket list on Pinnchester, some girl had pinned her bucket list, and her first wish was to shittpost on 2Chan, like a good man I just did that to honor a non-verbal promise between two strangers who met on social media."

"You're weird way too weird. Ahh... here's the man of this hour, we've been waiting for you Jin..." Zeke greeted with pleasure.

"I had to cancel my flight to Dallas. Zeke you said this was about some important business, where's the client? This better not be about finding a lost kitten in the city." Jin Fugui hissed.

"But that deal was a profitable business. Ms. Denise gave you a cheque of $100,000 as reward. I brought you the biggest business of your entire life."

"That's true." Jin Fugui admitted "But I don't wanna be known all over the world for finding the kin of Garfield. The hostage needs to be a human for God's sake. I don't post videos on YouTube, therefore in conclusion I don't need cats."

"You already know my cousin, Tony. He needs your help with a case. You can talk about all the details with him, he's over there watching a movie."

"It looks like fate has ordained us, to be on the same path together, here I thought I would never see you in this lifetime again Mr. Blair but there you are a sitting on that sofa-chair and watching a blockbuster. Don't get up, and don't turn off that movie, we both are in some severe need of entertainment. You see I was arrested by the DEA on some bogus charges of carrying Heroin, I admit I did have heroin but I have a prescription for that my psychiatrist, Jim Beaver a great guy, signed on that prescripition. There am I being harrased by the DEA about how am I some shady drug dealer from Hong Kong, if I had not pretended to be an stupid immigrant they would have surely put their finger inside my arse. I was lucky enough that there was a Hoover Boy at the airport, and if that FBI guy was not a nosy bystander I would probably have been in a detention centre talking about ramen & drugs with a Sicario from Mexico. What do you need Tony? I can't help if you don't say anything like a victim of domestic abuse; don't pretend to be a mute, Tony?"

"First of all, I don't need your help. Zeke's the one who called you without a reason."

"I specifically asked him not to call you, Frankly speaking Jin you are chatterbox not at all like your Korean counterpart."

"If you wanna be of some help, be quiet, zip that mouth, and watch this flick. We'll talk about business after this movie's over."

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