Chapter 18: Chapter 15 – Neurodivergent Train

The mag-rails used by the bullet trains got built up in the past 50 years, right after the lobbyists of the automotive industry got offed. Cars were exceedingly rare now, urban and suburban areas using trams and subways and trains, cars left for rural areas or emergency services. 

That is to say, the three of us were enjoying a quiet, speedy, calm ride to Seattle, passing by the reforested areas. It was too quiet. The only sound was Bournael munching on pretzel sticks. The train car was just the three of us, and of course the Conductor. Although they were in every car. The silence was killing me. 

“So… Saul Raymond Luxton…” I spoke up, trying to strangle the silence like you’d strangle an abuser. “What’s the deal with him? Did he end up in Hell just because he’s a capitalist pig?” Bournael stopped munching on his stick at my question. 

“He ate people in the unsexy way, ya see? Whole family did.” His answer made me gulp for a second, before sighing. 

“Did you have to word that he’s a cannibal that way?” I crossed my arms, and he shrugged. 

“No. I didn’t. But do you know how annoying it gets to have tah be a majestic semi-demonic bouncer?” Bournie cleared his throat. “Welcome, Thy Name, we have been expecting Thy coming. For Thy actions in life, thy eternal punishment has been decided.” The voice he put on gave me vibes as if Zeus or something was talking to me. “I ain’t into anal, so having that stick up my ass isn’t enjoyable at all.” He had returned to his Boston accent.

“Yeah I figure just a straight rod wouldn’t be enjoyable, but hey I’m not the one with a fursona who gets smut of said sona.” My gaze fell on Leonard, with a smirk. Somehow, he had managed to pass out while we traveled, getting the rest he desperately needed. “Right so, Saul is bad because he’s a cannibal?” I turned back to Bournie, who shrugged.

“Purgatory usually gets the survivalist type cannibals, you know the lot that myth says transform and stuff. If you’re the one responsible directly for the deaths of dozens just to feed an ego trip of superiority, along with sourcing your kills from the marginalised you think nobody cares about, well...” He took another bite of his pretzel stick. “That’s when you get sent to my neck of the afterlife to eternally starve while surrounded by other cannibals out of biting range. Honestly not the worst punishment we got. You should see the pit TERFS are in.” Bournie stretched out, putting his feet up as he had a bench to himself. “Just a bunch of two way mirror boxes with sound proofing, letting them yell and scream all their hateful thoughts and feelings with nobody to hear or see them.” He stashed the pretzel sticks away, checking the time. “Luci considered doing the Hell Is Other People route at first, and did a trial run with a group of five of them, but they made it Hell for the trans people living in the dorms under Luci’s protection. So they got the scream boxes filled with the voices of strawmen for them to argue with for eternity.” I nodded at his explanation, before a question formed in my mind. 

“So, what happened with Victor Show?” 

“Oh, the Last Channer Alive? Frozen Wasteland in the nude, literally made to Chill The Fuck out. Fucker asked if he was gonna go to heaven to spend eternity with some anime character, Lily Hochikawa he said.” 

“The eternally 12 year old zombie trans girl from Zombieland Saga?” Leonard seemed to have woken up at the mention of anime. What a fucking weeb. “Well that’s pedophile and chaser added onto his list of sins. Probably necrophilia too.” Leonard straightened himself out from his sleeping position. Had I mentioned he had fallen asleep in my lap? Yeah, he fell asleep in my lap. Maybe if he had the wolf ears of his fursona, I might have scratched him behind them. He is a chaotic dorky furry weeb who is horny on main and keeps fucking up spells, but dammit he’s my chaotic dorky furry weeb who is horny on main and keeps fucking up spells. Not in a dating sense, in a friend sense, get your mind out of the heterosexuality! He wasn’t even my type if I was into dudes. 

Well okay no, twinky furry that would be good at crossdressing and... Oh. My ideal dude is a girl who doesn’t know yet that she is one. Congrats Lily, you’re not escaping that attraction. Wait did I seriously call myself Lily in my thoughts?... I did. Fuck. Okay, keep hiding it. It’s gonna be fine. I’ll just… be Lily while home alone, I can do that, right? That won’t make dad mad, he’ll have his son trying to meet his expectations, without ever knowing said son spends his free time with a pair of boobs wearing cute dresses.  I can manage living like that, right? There was a bit of quick blunt pain coming from the side of my head, and I turned to face Leonard, whose hand was way too close and already reloaded for another flick. 

“You’re having a very concerning face journey and zoned out there for a solid three minutes. You doing okay?” He put his hand down, and I awkwardly nodded. 

“Yeah yeah, just some… just some thoughts bubbling to the surface that I’ve been burying since the ritual.” I wasn’t expecting Leonard to start giving me head pats in that moment, and so I pouted. “You’re the one with a wolfboy fursona out of the two of us, you’re the one who is supposed to be getting headpats.” 

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“And you’re the cute short girl with soft hair and a lot on her mind.” Oh. Pronouns usage. Fuck. No Lily don’t get happy about that we can’t be happy about that we’re supposed to be a guy we’re not allowed to be a girl. Damn you Leonard! Why must you curse me thrice?

“Sh-shut up, or I’ll show Bournie your stash.” I was definitely blushing. 

“Nah don’t, I ain’t interested in a dude’s porn stash, heck I’m not exactly a dude either. It wouldn’t embarrass him as much anyway. Now the shit the crew in Lust deals with now that’s some nasty shit.” Bournie frowned at the thought. “They let me take a peek once and I threw up. I don’t have a mouth in my demonic form. I threw up without a mouth! The amount of child porn and gore and rape was fucking sickening.” 

“So you don’t get sent to Lust for just being horny on main?” Leonard inquired. 

“Fuck no, have you SEEN Luci? Oh wait, you have, they personally greet trans arrivals to give them the whole ‘I own your soul to protect you, enjoy your new flat in a comfy spot, lets hang out sometime’ shtick. Hell would be full to the brim if every horny fucker came down there! Pun intended.” Bournie took a peek outside, sighing. “Nah, you have to do some nasty shit related to you being a horny fucker to get sent there.” His answer made me not, and remember something he had said earlier. 

“You said you’re not exactly a dude? Should I switch pronouns then?” 

“Nah, he/him’s fine, Lily. A supernatural’s relationship to gender is extremely individualised and personal. Most angels don’t have one, some develop one, plenty of demons switch or find something that fits them. I’d describe mine as the Raven yelling Nevermore in Poe’s Poem. It really sucks humans didn’t get to experiment as much as we did, due to the church and state and society and such.” There was a ding on the screen hanging from the ceiling, which turned to us and showed we were almost in Seattle already. “Well, you seem to have done some restructuring in regards to that though. Ten, twenty more years and maybe you’ll kick the habit of gendering babies based on genitals when they’re born. At least you completely stopped chopping them up if they don’t fit one or the other.” The three of us got up and moved to the door, right as the train stopped at the station. 

The moment the door opened, the smell of rain-filled air filled my lungs. Rain always smelled nice, but damn my heightened senses really brought it to another level. Ah, the nostalgia of visiting grandparents from mom’s side who lived here while I still lived with mom. They passed shortly before she did. Otherwise, I might have gotten a few years with them during my adolescence, instead of the prison room at dad’s place...

“Did either of you bring an umbrella?” Bournie asked, which made both me and Leo shake our heads, and me to yell out a loud internal fuck. “Leo’s fine, it’ll add to his edgy emo aesthetic, but with the glamour you’re using it’s gonna look really fucking weird that there’s two spots in front of your head that the rain flows around.” Bournie sighed and ushered us out of the train. “Give me a minute.” There was a sound of wings flapping as he disappeared, returning shortly with three umbrellas. A classic formal black one for him, a clear one for Leonard, and… one that was covered in kittens for me...

“Bournie are you making fun of me?” 

“I had to grab them from somewhere, and the only ones who would loan me any were a vodník who was visiting to check his souls for soul-tax purposes, and one of the closet monsters that spook kids into staying in bed and watches over them. That’s why the kittens.” He opened his up, along with a small notebook. “Alright, I grabbed the file on Saul, I know where his office is at, so let’s go bust some heads.” 

“Shouldn’t he be at home or something?” Leonard asked one of the few sensible questions he has asked in his whole life.

“His penthouse is in the headquarters of his company, considering he was listed as dead for nearly a year because he died in a plane crash and his body was never recovered. He’s making sure people are painfully aware he’s alive and kicking.” Bournie replied, hopping onto a tram with me and Leo in tow, headed for one of the few remaining skyscrapers in Seattle.