He Likes Me a Lot More Than I Thought!
It was, after all, one of the many inevitable things in the world.
I’ve been aware of that a long time ago.
“If…If I were to marry Shuelm or even get engaged, it would spike rumours. Even if it’s not serious now, what about after that?”
At first glance, Marie and Derick’s confident attitudes seemed to be more courageous to me.
“If a woman who is a mere commoner becomes the young madam of Sebrirua, there will constantly be problems, so I’m sure…”
I was unable to speak for a while. But after taking a deep breath, I finished my sentence.
“You’ll tell me to break up the marriage soon.”
I don’t believe I’m worth that much to them.
Because no matter how much you treat someone like your own children, in the end, blood relations were more important.
I was the lightest value for them.
Compared to Shuel and Rieta, I was of little value to be discarded compared to the children that will inherit the Sebrirua title.
I wanted to speak frankly, but resentment was mixed at the end of the sentence. I disliked that, so I bit my lips.
“Rwen……”
“I apologise if I crossed the line. I didn’t mean to blame you.”
Hasty words interrupted Derick.
I wanted to look fine, but I was already crumbling from that point.
The emotions I had been holding back were overflowing.
They did nothing wrong.
Even if what I said occurs, they were just taking back the goodwill they had given all this while.
Even if it’s cruel to me, what can I do, who had only been receiving so far?
Still, even if they didn’t, Marie and Derick felt like parents to me.
I didn’t want to discover the depth of their hearts by being pushed into an inevitable situation.
What I expect and what I really see with my own eyes are two different things.
It’s too much to experience being abandoned by your parents three times.
My eyes were blurry and a drop of tear fell. I quickly wiped away the tears with my hands.
I saw Derick and Marie with a clear vision.
“……You.”
Confused. Shocked.
“Have you been thinking that all this time?”
Anger.
My heart sank at that expression.
“Rwen, we’re adults so we’re more mature than you, but that doesn’t mean we don’t get hurt.”
Derick wiped his face dryly. Marie was also looking at me with her dark eyes.
“We…I think we need to have a long discussion.”
They’ve never shown this attitude to me before.
Even when it was a firm discipline, they were sweet and had never gotten angry with me.
My fingertips became cold and began to tremble. It was both embarrassing and scary.
At that moment, I wasn’t the 22-year-old me.
It was the 9-year-old child from a long time ago, who was afraid of being hated by her parents.
“We’ve been together for more than 10 years.”
Marie, who had stayed silent with her mouth closed, spoke up in the parlour where silence fell.
I tried predicting the words that would follow, but I couldn’t think of anything in my tired mind. In the end, I bit my lips as I didn’t think I would hear anything good.
“You are a child of Derick and me. Just like Shuel and Rieta.”
I was stunned by those words. I forgot my trembling hands.
It was an unexpected statement.
Marie smiled helplessly. After always looking so strong, she smiled like that for the first time.
Marie approached me and hugged me tightly. Her arms were still warm.
Derick seemed slightly angry, but he did the same. Then, he left the parlour along with Marie.
Left alone, I sat there blankly for a long time.
The words and warmth remained in my ears and lingered.
＊ ＊ ＊
Please do not repost. Read only at Dropped Inks.
Kendrick’s pace grew faster after he left the parlour.
Marius followed after her husband silently, climbing the stairs and entering the room at the end of the hallway, closing the door as Kendrick raised his voice, trembling.
“Arwen, she, seriously—!”
Kendrick, mixed between sorrow and anger, bit his lips.
“How do we make her stay, wh-what should I do? How could she say that to me!”
Marius listened with a sullen expression.
When she moved her emotional husband to the sofa and held his hand, Kendrick wiped his face with one hand.
“She’s my daughter. She’s our daughter, Marie. Right?”
Those sadly exasperated eyes turned to his wife as if seeking confirmation.
[1] From the saying ‘Bite any 10 fingers and it will all hurt the same’, meaning every child is equally dear to their parents and their child’s pain is their pain.
Just like Shuel and Rieta, Arwen meant everything to the couple.
“I raised her as my daughter for 13 years, and she regarded us like strangers.”
Therefore, Marius and Kendrick seemed to have been struck in the back of the head when Arwen said that with a smile.
It was painful to hear from your beloved daughter that you were strangers.
But they couldn’t just blame Arwen.
“It’s so upsetting, heartless and cruel……”
Kendrick’s voice faded with tears.
“Marie, did you see Rwen’s expression earlier?”
Marius nodded at Kendrick’s voice.
“She looked as if she was about to cry, but couldn’t shed a tear.”
It was a painful scene for Kendrick and Marius.
It was because of that expression that they couldn’t get angry with Arwen and went far away from the parlour where the child could not hear them.
“It was just like that time, 13 years ago.”
A small child that barely reached their waist.
The face of the child, who turned pale and only stared at him, was still engraved in his mind.
Even though he knew he had to send the child back, he kept staring and couldn’t bear to let her go.
Afterwards, the child became more and more familiar in their eyes.
They gave a part of their heart, thinking it was pity, but Arwen managed to dye it entirely before they knew it.
They knew she was a child with a lot of wounds. They did their best to care for Arwen.
Arwen was obedient. The child soon opened her heart and the shadow that casted over her was shortly lifted thereafter.
“I thought she was fine.”
That was what they had thought until they talked with Arwen today.
“So I was stupidly reassured. We love her, so I thought everything was alright.”
Kendrick sighed deeply. It was a breath that held many weights.
Marius, who looked at his figure painfully, quietly opened her mouth.
“I should have noticed, Derick.”
“…….”
“We all knew what made her mature.”
“…….”
“For the time that passed as we felt relieved, Arwen continued to be that lonely child.”
Marius’ quiet words were a rebuke. To her husband, and to herself.
“……Is it too late?”
Kendrick’s voice became weak.
“I, I don’t know. What should I do now?”
What should I do to soothe her? Kendrick’s eyes became unfocused.
Too late. He found out too late.
Arwen must have lived for a very long time, thinking she was inferior.
She said she would leave the house with a casual smile as if she had already isolated herself.
She was already hurt so badly, so what if she can’t heal?
“Marie, what should we do with our daughter?”
Marius, who was staring intently at her weeping husband, hugged Kendrick softly.
“It’s okay.”
“…….”
“Rwen will be fine. I’m sure of it.”
Marius mumbled as if pledging to him.
His sadness was the same as hers. But Marius held on to hope.
“Show that you love her very much. Just like you do to me, to Shuel, and to Rieta.”
She and Kendrick loved Arwen.
She also knew how precious and amazing her husband’s love was.
“Even if it’s difficult, you can do it.”
“…….”
“Like you said, we’re her parents.”
Marius believed that his genuine love would surely find a way.
“Will that be enough?”
Kendrick still seemed uneasy. Marias hugged her husband and smiled softly.
“It will be enough.”
Even if we are lacking, even if we are wrong.
We’re not the only ones who love that child.
Chapter 34: CH 33
I’ve been aware of that a long time ago.
“If…If I were to marry Shuelm or even get engaged, it would spike rumours. Even if it’s not serious now, what about after that?”
At first glance, Marie and Derick’s confident attitudes seemed to be more courageous to me.
“If a woman who is a mere commoner becomes the young madam of Sebrirua, there will constantly be problems, so I’m sure…”
I was unable to speak for a while. But after taking a deep breath, I finished my sentence.
“You’ll tell me to break up the marriage soon.”
I don’t believe I’m worth that much to them.
Because no matter how much you treat someone like your own children, in the end, blood relations were more important.
I was the lightest value for them.
Compared to Shuel and Rieta, I was of little value to be discarded compared to the children that will inherit the Sebrirua title.
I wanted to speak frankly, but resentment was mixed at the end of the sentence. I disliked that, so I bit my lips.
“Rwen……”
“I apologise if I crossed the line. I didn’t mean to blame you.”
Hasty words interrupted Derick.
I wanted to look fine, but I was already crumbling from that point.
The emotions I had been holding back were overflowing.
They did nothing wrong.
Even if what I said occurs, they were just taking back the goodwill they had given all this while.
Even if it’s cruel to me, what can I do, who had only been receiving so far?
I didn’t want to discover the depth of their hearts by being pushed into an inevitable situation.
What I expect and what I really see with my own eyes are two different things.
It’s too much to experience being abandoned by your parents three times.
My eyes were blurry and a drop of tear fell. I quickly wiped away the tears with my hands.
I saw Derick and Marie with a clear vision.
“……You.”
Confused. Shocked.
“Have you been thinking that all this time?”
Anger.
My heart sank at that expression.
“Rwen, we’re adults so we’re more mature than you, but that doesn’t mean we don’t get hurt.”
Derick wiped his face dryly. Marie was also looking at me with her dark eyes.
“We…I think we need to have a long discussion.”
They’ve never shown this attitude to me before.
Even when it was a firm discipline, they were sweet and had never gotten angry with me.
My fingertips became cold and began to tremble. It was both embarrassing and scary.
At that moment, I wasn’t the 22-year-old me.
It was the 9-year-old child from a long time ago, who was afraid of being hated by her parents.
“We’ve been together for more than 10 years.”
I tried predicting the words that would follow, but I couldn’t think of anything in my tired mind. In the end, I bit my lips as I didn’t think I would hear anything good.
“You are a child of Derick and me. Just like Shuel and Rieta.”
I was stunned by those words. I forgot my trembling hands.
It was an unexpected statement.
Marie smiled helplessly. After always looking so strong, she smiled like that for the first time.
Marie approached me and hugged me tightly. Her arms were still warm.
Derick seemed slightly angry, but he did the same. Then, he left the parlour along with Marie.
Left alone, I sat there blankly for a long time.
The words and warmth remained in my ears and lingered.
＊ ＊ ＊
Please do not repost. Read only at Dropped Inks.
Kendrick’s pace grew faster after he left the parlour.
Marius followed after her husband silently, climbing the stairs and entering the room at the end of the hallway, closing the door as Kendrick raised his voice, trembling.
“Arwen, she, seriously—!”
Kendrick, mixed between sorrow and anger, bit his lips.
“How do we make her stay, wh-what should I do? How could she say that to me!”
Marius listened with a sullen expression.
When she moved her emotional husband to the sofa and held his hand, Kendrick wiped his face with one hand.
“She’s my daughter. She’s our daughter, Marie. Right?”
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She was only a child with an exceptionally painful finger[1], pretending to be an adult at the age of nine. They had no blood relations, but because of that they paid more attention and took great care of her.[1] From the saying ‘Bite any 10 fingers and it will all hurt the same’, meaning every child is equally dear to their parents and their child’s pain is their pain.
Just like Shuel and Rieta, Arwen meant everything to the couple.
“I raised her as my daughter for 13 years, and she regarded us like strangers.”
Therefore, Marius and Kendrick seemed to have been struck in the back of the head when Arwen said that with a smile.
It was painful to hear from your beloved daughter that you were strangers.
But they couldn’t just blame Arwen.
“It’s so upsetting, heartless and cruel……”
Kendrick’s voice faded with tears.
“Marie, did you see Rwen’s expression earlier?”
Marius nodded at Kendrick’s voice.
“She looked as if she was about to cry, but couldn’t shed a tear.”
It was a painful scene for Kendrick and Marius.
It was because of that expression that they couldn’t get angry with Arwen and went far away from the parlour where the child could not hear them.
“It was just like that time, 13 years ago.”
A small child that barely reached their waist.
The face of the child, who turned pale and only stared at him, was still engraved in his mind.
Even though he knew he had to send the child back, he kept staring and couldn’t bear to let her go.
Afterwards, the child became more and more familiar in their eyes.
They knew she was a child with a lot of wounds. They did their best to care for Arwen.
Arwen was obedient. The child soon opened her heart and the shadow that casted over her was shortly lifted thereafter.
“I thought she was fine.”
That was what they had thought until they talked with Arwen today.
“So I was stupidly reassured. We love her, so I thought everything was alright.”
Kendrick sighed deeply. It was a breath that held many weights.
Marius, who looked at his figure painfully, quietly opened her mouth.
“I should have noticed, Derick.”
“…….”
“We all knew what made her mature.”
“…….”
“For the time that passed as we felt relieved, Arwen continued to be that lonely child.”
Marius’ quiet words were a rebuke. To her husband, and to herself.
“……Is it too late?”
Kendrick’s voice became weak.
“I, I don’t know. What should I do now?”
What should I do to soothe her? Kendrick’s eyes became unfocused.
Too late. He found out too late.
Arwen must have lived for a very long time, thinking she was inferior.
She was already hurt so badly, so what if she can’t heal?
“Marie, what should we do with our daughter?”
Marius, who was staring intently at her weeping husband, hugged Kendrick softly.
“It’s okay.”
“…….”
“Rwen will be fine. I’m sure of it.”
Marius mumbled as if pledging to him.
His sadness was the same as hers. But Marius held on to hope.
“Show that you love her very much. Just like you do to me, to Shuel, and to Rieta.”
She and Kendrick loved Arwen.
She also knew how precious and amazing her husband’s love was.
“Even if it’s difficult, you can do it.”
“…….”
“Like you said, we’re her parents.”
Marius believed that his genuine love would surely find a way.
“Will that be enough?”
Kendrick still seemed uneasy. Marias hugged her husband and smiled softly.
“It will be enough.”
Even if we are lacking, even if we are wrong.
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