Chapter 5: Break Time

To: All Inbound Specialists of Department Zero

From: Robert York, Head of Department Zero

RE: Break Time

 

 

Okay. I get that we all want to maximize our break time. Leave a few minutes early, come back a few minutes late. Well, its getting really bad. I warned everyone that if you didn't police yourselves, I'd be forced to put monitors in the break room.

 

So you all will have, by now, noticed the multiple giant lizards in the break room. They are monitor lizards. They are there to make sure you don't arrive too soon, or stay too late in the break room.

 

As one of you has found out, they do not react well to cold. I am rather upset someone decided to vent liquid hydrogen into the break room to chill things down in order to gain a few extra minutes on break. I don't CARE if the liquid hydrogen was spoiled and needed to be dumped anyways! Do you have any idea at what temperature Hydrogen goes liquid?

 

Well, I'm glad one of you managed to scam an extra 10 minutes of break time, but all the Monitor lizards are frozen stiff as a board. Good job. And yes, at that temperature they shatter quite easily, thank you very much.

 

No. Me and Jenkins are NOT cleaning up the break room. You guys can clean up all the fragments of shattered monitor lizard all over the place and I suggest you get a move on before they defrost. Do you know what a half dozen rotting monitor lizards smells like? I'm sure we all remember last Valentine's day.

 

Who ever did this, FIX IT.

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