Chapter 6: Chapter 6: The Dream of the Butterfly IV

Sitting on the floor, slowly calming her breathing, Reilanis braced herself for what was to come. The tears she had shed a while ago had stopped. She had also cleaned them with what was left of her dress that she had torn to shreds earlier. In a way grateful that she ended up that way. Reilan waited patiently for her mate to psych herself up for the journey ahead of them both.

The sound of a great gasp of air echoed through the room. She stretched out her arms and legs trying to get as much tension out as she could.

Nervous as she was, she was also relieved. She thought that maybe if she got through this, the nightmares would end. The days when she sometimes she felt like her back was on fire might be over soon. “Maybe I could finally say it…” She thought. A small hopeful smile spread across her face.

She took a deep breath one last time, sit firmly on the ground in a lotus position, and loudly, to affirm her determination, she announced, "I'm ready."

As soon as she uttered those words, it began. Although different from the previous times. Without an initial headache. Even now I look at things differently.

Reilanis stood in an open field as if she had been teleported out of her dungeon. She was immediately on her guard, thinking that something had gone wrong. Her mind immediately focused, her sight and hearing sharpened, ready to react to whoever was responsible for bringing her to this place.

"Calm down. We are still in your mind. Well, more specifically, in your memories."

A familiar voice was heard right behind her. She hadn't noticed his presence until the moment he spoke.

She reacted with a jump, putting distance between them and preparing to engage in combat at that very moment. Except that…

“I told you to calm down. I'm just me"

In front of her was an unknown person. No, she knew him, especially his voice. But his appearance confused her. He was a thin man, considerably taller than her. About 175cm (5.7) tall, skinny, very skinny. His skin was pale as if he had never felt the sun's rays. His dark brown hair was long and unkempt, it seemed that he didn't wash it often much less take care of it in any way. It was loose, greasy, and hung below his shoulders. Dark bags under his hazel eyes. Bushy eyebrows highlighted his tired expression. He had a beard just as unkempt as his hair, growing out of control. He looked like he hadn't shaved in weeks. He was wearing a shirt a little too big for his body, printed with a picture of a catkin girl in a pink dress too flashy and revealing. Ripped, well-worn jeans, and a pair of low-boot-like shoes, so damaged it was a miracle the seams on them still held them together. From the way he looked, Reilanis guessed that he was human and could be almost, if not over, 40 years old. “But his voice is…” Reilanis thought. Confused because the person in front of her did not fit with the voice that had comforted her a moment ago in a kind and understanding tone.

“Yes Lani, it's me, Reilan. Well, I know my voice doesn't match my appearance, but you don't have to give me that look, it feels a bit…painful.”

“Oh, I… s-sorry”

"It's okay. I know that my… unkempt appearance can surprise anyone. I'm also surprised by this. I didn't think that… I would have my body again. It feels strange to come back to it after being inside you for so long… And that sounded worse than I thought.”

An amused laugh came from Reilanis. It was certainly a strange situation, but everything up until now had been, so something as ridiculous as this only made her feel foolish for having been so tense.

"So... where are we?" Reilanis asked, after approaching her partner and checking her surroundings. In a part of her mind, she felt strangely jealous of the height of the man next to her. Concerned about how small she looked next to him. Something strange, considering that she had met many people much taller even than Reilan, but only he had given her that feeling of "defeat".

"Well, it's your memories so..."

"Right."

Reilanis cleared his mind of the unnecessary thoughts she had been having, and scanned everything around her, trying to find any clues that would indicate her position.

They were on a little hill, the sun…suns? Two big and brilliant spheres of incandescent fire that illuminated the entire world, adorned the almost completely clear sky. Ahead of her, what she guessed was the east, an endless plain of short grass. To her left was the entrance to a very dense forest, and to the right, a straight path that led to a small settlement not far away.

Reilanis stared at the end of that path with a frown. It didn't take her long to recognize that place.

“I already have an idea of ​​where we are at least. It is… my homeland.”

"I see. What do you want to do?"

“?” Confused, she looked at Reilan who was still standing next to her, hands in his pockets and wearing a weary expression, but with a reassuring smile.

“We are here for you, so you decide how we move. Do you want to fast-forward and get this all over with, or do you want to take things slowly? It's up to you. I’ll be with you when you need it.”

Reilanis looked at him in surprise. His words felt strange to her. Normally she was the one who took the initiative in situations and gave words to her companions to move forward, alleviating their fears or concerns. She didn't expect that this time she would be the one on the receiving end.

She thought for a moment. With Reilan by her side, she felt calm, so she considered going slowly. Although she was anxious about everything that would happen, her partner brought her calm. A slight blush painted her cheeks. She had never had siblings…or parents, but Reilan was beginning to feel that way about her. An older brother. Realizing that made her feel embarrassed. It was a feeling so foreign that make her feel confused, but… it didn't feel bad.

"The best… - began nervously. – It would be to start walking towards the village.”

"I follow you."

Reilan answered with a smile, and with his hand, he indicated that she led the way.

They proceeded down the dirt path for several minutes until they came to a wall of logs at least 12 feet high and stretching several hundred feet long on the sides. In the middle was a huge door, also made of the same type of logs, plated in several places with heavy iron plates that served as reinforcement. On either side of the door, two huge men half the height of the wall, one red-skinned on the left, the other blue-skinned on the right. Neither paid attention to the 2 strangers who had come to the entrance they were guarding.

Reilanis tried to punch the pair of guards, but her fist went through both men's bodies, so they decided to ignore them. They were in something similar to a dream, and it didn't seem like they could interact with anyone in that place, so they had no choice but to move forward.

They entered the town, heading to a specific location on the west side.

Not far from the entrance was a ramshackle shack that looked more like a pile of rubble that conveniently fell on each other, allowing for a minimally habitable space in between. Reilanis stood in front of the door, which was nothing more than a rotten wooden board carelessly placed in the hole that served as the entrance.

Her expression was a bit wistful, with a hint of sadness.

The board moved from its place, and a small figure stepped out from behind it. A much smaller Reilanis, perhaps 8 or 9 years old, wearing something similar to a potato sack cut off at the edges and tied with an old string at her waist to prevent it from opening too far on the sides. Beneath that, she didn't seem to be wearing anything more than a loincloth covering her crotch. Reilan was relieved by that. Seeing her, he had worried that little Lani had to live out her childhood walking almost naked through her hometown.

The young Oni girl was carrying in her arms a basket just as poorly made as the house she seemed to live in, presumably made by herself. She walked past the taller Reilanis who had been stunned to stare at herself in her younger form.

The girl, who kept an annoyed expression on her face, walked towards the entrance of the town, heading towards the forest.

“Where are you… she going?”

“To the forest where we came from.”

"Alone?"

“It's not like I have a choice. It was my only way to get food, no one here cared about me. Actually, for them, I didn't even exist." Reilanis replied in a contemptuous tone. Her sad look focused on the girl who was walking away from her on the road.

“Do we follow her? Uh… shall we follow you? This is somewhat confusing."

"No, I won't make it out of town anyway."

At that very moment 5 children approached her, 4 of them wore mocking expressions, while one of them, the one who seemed the youngest, looked extremely uncomfortable.

The 4 brats, slightly taller than the younger Reilanis, blocked her path, preventing her from moving forward.

"*sigh* What do you want now?" the girl growled.

"Who do you think you're talking to like that freak?"

"Yes, you should be more respectful to the chief's son" The 3 children, who seemed to be mere ass-lickers of the largest among them, laughed disdainfully, feeling superior.

"Quiet. – The largest of the group, apparently the chief's son, expressed with false empathy - Remember that she is nothing more than a simple and weak monster. I wouldn't feel right forcing her to follow the customs of us intelligent beings."

Reilanis, the oldest, was watching the whole thing from a few feet away. She didn't look upset or sad. Her expression was neutral as if she only saw a group of animals by the side of the road. Unlike the younger one, she had her fists clenched.

"What's going on? The little monster has…”

A loud bang resounded throughout the place without letting him finish his insult. The smaller Reilanis had thrown a punch directly at the larger boy's face, apparently breaking his nose. Not letting him even have the time to understand what had happened, the girl lunged at him, dealing a large number of blows to his face. The other 3 froze, trying to understand what was happening.

“Heh, I remember that day well. – Reilanis related with slight joy – I was hungry. The night before I wasn’t able to catch anything and I had run out of firewood. Worst of all, the makeshift shoes I made out of old leather that I found lying around had just broken down, so I was pretty cranky and hungry. The last thing I needed was for that group of idiots to show up. Although, in the end, it was a blessing for me.”

"Why?"

Reilanis snorted, amused by the memory of her. "I was able to take out all my stress by smashing the face of the chief's son"

Tired of the beating she had given the bigger brat, the girl stood up and glared at the other 3 who were staring at her in horror. Not wanting to say anything else, the 3 helped the biggest one up, and took him away from there, leaving behind threats that they would tell their parents to take care of her. The young Reilanis only growled at them in annoyance.

"Nothing happened?"

"Nope. As far as I know, they were scolded for not ignoring me as the adults did. It was practically a law of the people to ignore my existence. The only exception was…”

While the young Reilanis retrieved the basket that she had been battered by being thrown to the ground, the remaining girl came up behind her with obvious nervousness. She seemed to want to talk to her, but she was very hesitant to do so. Her mouth opened and closed like a fish, and her hand went up and back to her breast in an attempt to get the other girl's attention.

"She…?"

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"Mika"

The name of the girl who had gotten close to the younger Reilanis. Mika was an oni with blue skin, and short purple hair, a little below her ears. Her gaze was sad expressed intensely by her red eyes, which contrasted with the skin of the younger Reilanis. She was wearing a nice white dress and leather sandals.

The young Reilanis had done a 180° turn in her mood when she saw her. She didn't look upset, not even remotely, just… uncomfortable. Too much actually.

"Um... what's going on here?"

“Mika was… well, she was the only one out of all the other kids who not only didn't ignore me, but she tried to get along with me. It is difficult to explain. She said that she hated that the adults ignored me and the rest of the children treated me badly, but she was forced to do nothing.”

"Forced?"

“Her parents had promised her to the chief's son. She was that asshole's fiancée. It's not like she wanted it, but thanks to it, she couldn't do anything but watch."

Reilan imagined the complicated feelings that the girl must have, feeling powerless because if she did something, it would be worse for both of them.

The two girls seemed to be struggling to start a conversation, but Reilanis, with her discomfort and with Mika feeling disgruntled, had turned into a contest to see which of the two took the least time to return their gaze to the ground after being discovered looking at the other…

A long time after that staring contest, Mika couldn't stand the silence and the awkward stares anymore.

"So... were you going to the forest?"

“Y-yes. I… I was left with nothing to eat.”

“I-I see.”

And just like that, the conversation turned back to silence and awkward stares. Reilan couldn't take it and look at the Reilanis next to him, only to notice that the girl had a very sad look on her face.

"Hey what's up?"

"Just... Nostalgia I guess." Reilanis sighed sadly. The look she directed toward the two girls had a hint of regret.

"First love?" Reilan asked, partly out of curiosity, partly in jest.

"Yes."

"WHAT? Really?"

“N-NO! – Reilanis shouted, denying it with all her might. "I-I mean she was the only one I liked, just that!"

“If you deny it like that you are only affirming it more. Although I guess I can understand why she would be your first love since she was the only one who treated you differently."

Reilanis couldn't continue speaking, her face was… well, redder than usual, which was quite amusing to see. She turned her attention back to the younger girls at that awkward moment, until the younger version of her, with the same shade of red on her face, decided that she had had enough, and she ran towards the entrance. from the village, towards the forest.

An unknown wind began to blow, causing both the younger Reilanis and Mika to turn to dust and disappear with it.

 

…

 

They were both standing now, in another part of the village. It was the evening and the young Reilanis, now perhaps 12 years old, was watching from a distance, at a group of oni surrounding a human. This human, a woman, was quite a bit shorter than the villagers, around 160cm, with dark skin and braided black hair, she wore leather armor over chainmail that protruded in various parts of her body, making her very conspicuous. She wore a short sword on both sides of her waist and iron boots with wide plates. It looked like they were made to stop weapon blows and not just protect her legs. She was talking to a blue-skinned oni who seemed to be the village chief.

"A rather abrupt transition... Who is the human?" Reilan exclaimed, somewhat disoriented by the sudden change.

“Rita, she was the one who taught me that there was a very big world outside the town. She told me about the adventurers, the monsters, the heroes… all the things that were too amazing and exciting that existed far away from this place and she also taught me how to fight”

The human, Rita, finished talking to the boss and headed toward where Reilanis was. The girl immediately became happy and fired a huge number of questions at her, making the human laugh happily.

They talked for a long time, topics about the quests Rita had done, the monsters she has faced, places she has visited, and all kinds of stories that made the youngest Reilanis's heart beat with emotion.

As fast as that memory hit, she was gone. Same as above, disappearing in the wind like dust.

 

…

 

Now they were in front of Reilanis's dilapidated house. It was very early in the morning and the sky was dark and cloudy, although it didn't look like it was going to rain.

The young, red-skinned oni, who now seemed older, maybe 15 years old, about the same height as the current Reilanis, stood in the doorway, clad in makeshift leather armor that barely held on, covering her chest and abdomen. Her pants were cloth with pieces of leather sewn into the important areas of her legs and was wearing surprisingly better shoes than the rest of her makeshift outfit. She stood still, holding a large leather sack on her shoulder, looking with sad eyes at the blue-skinned oni girl in front of her.

"Are you really going to go?"

“…”

"Rei, please don't." Mika groaned with sadness. She kept her eyes fixed on the young Reilanis's face, hoping to see some change in her decision.

"You know that it is much better for me if I go and make my life out of this place."

"Rei, if you leave there's no way they'll ever let you come back!"

Reilanis both looked at the blue-skinned girl with pain. The youngest, because she knew that if she left, she would never see her again, and the oldest, because she knew that it had come true.

"Mika - they both said at the same time, their voice breaking as they pronounced each letter of her name - here, there is nothing but loneliness, rejection, and pain for me."

“And what about-!?” The question stuck in her throat. "What about me?" It was what she most wanted to say. But even she knew that even if she said it, nothing would change. It didn't matter if they both knew of each other's feelings, even if they never said them. It would be impossible for anything to come up while they were there, trapped. Reilanis knew all too well if she tried anything, the adults who treated her like she didn't exist would act first, and she knew she wouldn't get away with just a warning or a beating.

"Mika. You can still come with me.”

Mika hesitated. She looked at the hand Reilanis held out to her, wishing it would be so much easier just to take it, not caring at all about the consequences. But she couldn't. The fear going against her family's orders, that if she did, they would be hunted down for heresy…that they might even kill her beloved. There was no way she was going to do it.

Reilanis withdrew her hand from hers and dropped it to her side in pain and disappointment. Not because Mika didn't take it, but because she knew she wouldn't, but she still had hope.

With a sigh, to keep her emotions from spilling over, she rearranged the sack she was carrying on her shoulder, and then took one last look at the town, at her house, and then… at Mika.

“I wish things had been different.” Young Reilanis raised his hand to Mika, caressing her cheek gently, taking with it a single tear that fell from her. She withdrew her hand and brought it to her forehead, in the space between her horns, and with her closed eyes, she uttered a single word.

“Amisha”

Hearing that made Mika burst into tears, falling to her knees on the floor.

Reilanis did not look at her again and walked towards the gate, leaving the town forever.

"What-"

“There is a custom among our people – the older Reilanis related, with obvious sadness in her voice. A large number of tears fell down her cheeks. She was hugging herself in an attempt to keep her composure. She used all her strength not to break like Mika had right in front of her. – Never let the first tear that your beloved sheds touch the ground, because if it does, you will never deserve her love, neither in this life nor in the next. Carrying it towards your forehead, between your horns, means that you accept any punishment that the world gives you and that you are willing to rip them off in exchange for her happiness. “Amisha” means “for her”. A promise that no matter what happens, that promise will never be broken."

Reilan just listened. Even he could feel the weight of that promise, even if he didn't understand the custom or its background. He only approached Reilanis and hugged her from the side, while they both watched the youngest of the town depart from her, while, again, the wind carried everything away like dust.

 

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