Secretly Holding Hands with You Behind Our Friends’ Back. Falling in Love That Cannot Be Told to Anyone

Chapter 2: 1


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EPISODE 1 – SECRETS

When I first entered high school, it was just me, Shintarou, and Seiran.

I was happy to be in the same class as these bad friends in high school. 

The three of us would make noise together every day.

At some point in time, Yoru Narushima was standing beside us.

She was shy, withdrawn, and didn’t say much, but she was always around.

Even when the three of us were playing smartphone games during break time. Or when we were eating on the rooftop during lunch break. Or when we were staying in the classroom after school to discuss where we would hang out.

Yoru Narushima was always standing there beside us with a timid smile on her face.

I immediately guessed that she was approaching us for Seiran. Even though she was such a quiet girl, she was awfully aggressive, which left me impressed.

Anyhow, with how Narushima was standing next to us all this time, I invited her to join us, and the four of us would play smartphone games and go home together.

“It kind of looks like three bad boys taking a timid girl around, doesn’t it?”

 

Perhaps anxious about Narushima-san, who was alone in the group of guys, Hinoko Asagiri forced her way in and said,

“I want to be a part of this~.”

Thus, the group of three men became a group of five, including the two girls.

Every one of us went to karaoke, bowling, and dinner together.

It’s been about two months since we became a group of five.

Somewhere along the line, it became natural for the five of us to be together.

“Hey, you know Seiran-kun…if you’d like, um, do you want to go to the movies this Sunday?”

In the classroom during break time, I witnessed Narushima-san inviting Seiran to a movie.

“Aah, this Sunday.”

Seiran, brushing his light brown hair, glances at me.

……Yes, yes, I know, I know. 

Hold on a minute…..

Sighing, I forced myself to get excited and charged into the circle of Seiran and the others.

“What, are we going to see a movie!? Just in time, there’s a movie I want to see too!”

Seiran smiles at me, thankful for my help.

“Ah, now that you mention it, Junya. I think it’s that B-grade action movie that’s showing now?”

“That’s it! I heard it’s a stupid movie with nothing but explosions, but I think we should all go see it!?”

“Haha, that sounds interesting. Is that okay with you, Narushima?”

Narushima-san, who was being talked to by Seiran, looked at us with her mouth agape.

Then, she shrugged her shoulders like a fainthearted little animal and gave a slight grimace.

“That’s right….it’s more enjoyable to watch such a movie with others…….”

Shintarou, who was nearby, overheard her.

“….You know. I still don’t think this sort of interruption is good…”

“…You don’t have to say that. After all, this hurts my heart too.”

Just to let you know, of course, this has nothing to do with the “No Girlfriend Alliance”. In the first place, such an alliance was just a joke we made in junior high school, and no one took it seriously.

This was something Seiran had asked me to do separately.

Recently, Narushima has been trying to get alone with Seiran whenever possible. As expected, Seiran seemed to have sensed various things himself, saying, “Of course, I don’t mind, but it’s more fun when we’re all together. You  have to break it up nicely.”

So it was our role to intervene.

However, Shintarou is not a character, so practically, I’m the only one with a role to play.

Even so, Narushima-san’s refusal to give up was truly admirable, and I felt nothing but guilt.

If that’s the case, why wouldn’t I turn down such an absurd request? It’s obvious.

It’s because I myself am thinking,

“Love can wait a little longer.”

When it comes to the group.

Love problems in a group of friends are truly difficult.

For example, I dare to say that I know this is unavoidable.

If someone confesses to someone else, regardless of whether they fail or succeed, that’s the end of it for the five of us.

People who fail to confess will naturally feel uncomfortable in the group and leave, and the same is true even if they succeed and become a couple. People who become a couple, after all, may become a little distant from us.

So, in a real sense, this is the only time that the five of us can be best friends without constraint.

If Narushima-san decides to confess, I don’t know if she’ll end up going out with Seiran or if she’ll get rejected. ──── No, unfortunately, it’s more likely that she will get rejected.

Either way, I wanted to stay with my current group of five friends for a little while longer, at least until the end of this summer. I wanted to have an easygoing relationship with my best friend that had nothing to do with love.

I was fully aware that this was a selfish idea. 

I think I have a nasty personality.

But really, it’s fine until this summer is over. 

Because this summer, we are all together───。

Asagiri-san came flying at me and said,

“Hey, hey, hey!”

“You’re not going to listen to Yoru again? Really, these guys are …..”

“No, it’s okay, Honoko-chan. If they want to go to a movie, let’s go together. Right?”

Ah, I’m truly sorry for making the shy Yoru look like this…I’m sorry for being a jerk.

But even though I knew that. I couldn’t help but thrust my head into it.

The five of us together, it had really become too commonplace.

No one else is doing club activities, so the five of us are still together when we leave.

The topic of conversation was the first semester’s final examinations, which will start soon.

We talked about having a study session together. But we laughed about it, thinking that we would end up talking nothing but nonsense.

Eventually, I stopped at my usual intersection.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Everyone except me commutes to school by train, so I’m going to have to part from everyone here.

“Ah, um…I have some business to attend to this way…so, bye everyone….”

For some reason, Narushima-san also stayed behind with me.

Business over here? Was there even anything to do in this area? This is as rural as it can get.

Seiran and the others, who didn’t seem to have any particular doubts, raised their hands and walked away, saying, “See you later.”

There were only two people left in the area, me and Narushima-san.

“Where are you going now, Narushima-san?”

“I want to talk to Koga-kun alone. Can you come with me for a minute?”

…..I see. She must be asking me for advice. Surely it’s about Seiran.

I didn’t mention anything else and followed Narushima, who was already walking away.

In the hot sunshine at the end of the rainy season, I followed Narushima-san, who was walking ahead of me, and we were forced to walk along the wide prefectural road with merely nothing but fields standing out.

It’s been nearly 40 minutes. Of course, I already passed by my house long ago.

Where we were heading is still a mystery even to me. A march with no destination in sight was quite mentally demanding.

In addition, Narushima-san was a person of few words, which also added to my fatigue.

“Hey, seriously, how much further are we going to go…?”

I mumbled to myself for the umpteenth time, exhausted from the heat and fatigue.

“Just a little more.”

That was the only response I got. The whole time, this exchange was repeated. Repeatedly.

“…Um. Can’t we just stand around and talk? I’m already worn out from walking.”

When I finally stopped, I felt sweat clinging to my entire body, which was just depressing.

“You’re so sloppy.”

Narushima-san, who looked back at me, chuckled.

That. I don’t remember her having such a face.

Her face was more like that of a hunter aiming for its prey, rather than the timid little animal she usually was.

“Well, I guess we can do it here.”

Narushima-san pointed to a huge convenience store with a parking lot on the edge of the prefectural road.

“Hey, Koga-kun. Can you get me an ice cream?”

“Eh, why for?”

“Just listen to what a girl requests. Pooh.”

…..Just as I thought, something’s weird. The atmosphere was different from usual. I grew so uncomfortable that I felt like asking her,  “Are you really Yoru Narushima?”

“Well, I’ll get the money later.”

“Huh? You’re taking money from a girl?”

What’s with this person?

It’s common courtesy not to say those lines even if you think you should.

Perhaps it’s that. She’s angry at me for interfering with her relationship with Seiran.

If that’s the case…then this is bad.

Overcome with guilt. I obediently went to the convenience store to buy some ice cream.

But I soon noticed right away.

I was just thoughtlessly walking around, possibly as a form of “harassment”.

In the parking lot of the convenience store, Narushima-san received the ice cream bar from me, thanked me briefly, and started crunching on it.

“So? What did you want to talk about?”

I took a sip of the sports drink I bought for myself and sighed.

At any rate, I’m sure she’ll be consulting me for advice regarding Seiran, but I really want to get home quickly and take a shower.

“Nfufu.”

Narushima-san looked at me with a lecherous smile as she ran her red tongue over the ice cream bar.

“Koga-kun, you really can’t read the air, can you?”

“What?”

“I know you don’t think so, but haven’t you noticed? That I like Seiran-kun?”

No, of course, I’m aware of it.

Or perhaps I should say, with how often she was appealing to him, wouldn’t it be strange not to notice?

“You know it, yet you still deliberately interrupt me like a kid, don’t you? Why?”

“But a kid is….”

It’s true, but the tone of her voice was unexpectedly sharp and a little atrophy.

“Hey, answer me. Why do you always get in my way whenever I try to get close to Seiran-kun?”

“W-Well, how should I put it….”

It was Seiran’s request────just as I thought. I can’t possibly say that.

Besides, it was my decision too.

I was under pressure from Narushima-san’s strange intensity, and I scratched my temple, which wasn’t itching, and said, 

“Um……I like my current relationship with my five friends……so I’d like to keep it that way for a little while longer……”

Narushima-san stared at me blankly and eventually said, 

“────Pfft, ahahaha! What? Eh, that kind of reason? Hahahahaha!”

It was a loud laugh.

“Well, I guess it can’t be helped since you’re a male kid in first grade….but, haha. You’re such a virgin. It’s hilarious.”

……Wait a minute.

No, seriously, wait a minute. I’ve been wondering about this for quite some time now.

Eh, is this Yoru Narushima’s true character? Such a thing?

The usual, introverted and withdrawn figure, is the so-called wolf in sheep’s clothing….don’t tell me that’s her true nature?

“Well….first of all, I’m sorry. There’s no doubt that I’ve been doing things that Narushima-san deserves to hate me for…”

For the time being, I’ll obediently apologize.

“Oh, don’t worry about that. I didn’t like Koga-kun from the beginning anyway.”

What, so you’ve hated me from the beginning…seriously….you don’t have to say it so easily…

“He’s annoying, he’s a kid, and he’s always around Seiran-kun. Ever since I’ve first met him, I’ve been thinking, 『Oh, how I’d wish he disappear~』. Oh, maybe I’ll write that on a Tanabata strip of paper.”

This two-facedness…isn’t this slightly dangerous? It’s so different from school that it freaks me out.

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“Say….Narushima-san, that’s…..”

“What’s that? Are you getting ready to disappear? O Great Virgin Lord of the Shitty Brat Kingdom.”

──Yeah. I’m bad at dealing with this person.

That’s what I thought when I saw Narushima Yoru saluting me with a bully’s smile.

It’s completely my fault that I’ve been interfering with things, even though it was Seiran’s request, you know? But even with that out of the way, this dark side is way too dangerous. Moreover, she also said she hated me from the beginning…

I was so shocked because I had believed that we were a close group of five.

But whenever the five of us were together, she was always laughing moderately at the edge of us fooling around, and that serves as a lubricant for all of us. In any case, she’s still a necessary presence.

So even if she was just a wolf in sheep’s clothing, from now on, if she could keep up with the five of us in the future, I’ll pretend I didn’t see her true nature────

“Hmm. When I say I want you to disappear, I mean it. I don’t mean it as it is. So, just to confirm.”

Narushima-san pursed her pouty lips and sucked on the ice cream stick profusely in a very sensual way.

“Koga-kun. You like Honoko-chan, right?”

“What….!?”

“Hahahaha. What an easy to understand reaction. You’re a real virgin, alright. You’re so cute, dai ōsama ♪.”

How────did you know that?

Shintarou as well as Seiran. In addition, Honoko Asagiri, the person in question.

It’s a secret only for me that I haven’t told anyone.

“I don’t think Honoko-chan realizes this, but. Koga-kun seems to like girls similar to Honoko-chan. Especially if it’s a boy who likes to make noise with his friends.”

Bull’s eye, she hit the mark.

I’m attracted to Honoko Asagiri.

It’s not just because she’s cute. She’s like a male friend, and it’s really fun to be with her.

At first, I thought it was just friendship, but I found myself following Asagiri-san with my eyes before I noticed.

I realized that this was a romantic feeling.

But of course, I don’t want to be her boyfriend. I have no intention of confessing.

I like the relationship I have with my current group of five friends.

For that reason, I’ll keep my feelings for Asagiri-san under strict lock, shut away at the bottom of my inner heart.

I wasn’t going to let them out for the rest of my life.

“That’s why I’ll act as a go-between for you and Honoko-chan. If Koga-kun gets a girlfriend, he won’t be able to come between Seiran-kun and me, as expected, right? Isn’t that a win-win situation for the both of us?”

“….That isn’t necessary.”

“Oh? Are you saying that you’ll take care of it yourself? Oh~, you’re surprisingly manly, aren’t you?”

The short Narushima-san prone down and peered into my face. On her face was a big, bottom-feeding smile.

Close. So close, in fact, that her ferocious rocket tits almost hit me.

“But, such a thing like this will definitely go smoothly if you cooperate, right? Since you’ve said you’ll cooperate, why don’t you just be obedient and bow down and say, 『Please, Yoru Narushima』Hora hora ~.”

“Like I said, it’s fine.”

“Fufu. Well, I don’t mind anything as long as Koga-kun can get a girlfriend.”

After I drank my sports drink, I told Narushima-san, who had a bully-like smile on her face,

“──Bleh. No, I don’t really care about that? I’m satisfied with our current friendship.”

“What?”

Narushima-san looked like she couldn’t comprehend what I had just said.

“What do you mean….? You like Honoko-chan, but you won’t do anything about it….?”

“That’s right. Didn’t I tell you? That I’m not going to get a girlfriend.”

“What….even though I hate Koga-kun, he’ll still go through the trouble to cooperate!?”

Ugh, once again, she said that word “Hate.”

It’s better not to say it even if you think about it.

I’m not good at dealing with Narushima-san, but, if possible, I’d like to have a good relationship with her.

As far as I’m concerned, the time with those five people is really special to me.

But if you were to hit me with hostility, as one would expect, I will get somewhat angry.

In the first place, I’m something of a mental tofu myself.

I’m awful at dealing with another person’s abusive language. I get depressed immediately. Not to mention that she’s a bit scary…

“Well, in short. The reason why Narushima-san wants me and Asagiri-san to get together is that she wants me to disappear from in front of Seiran, ……right?”

“That’s what I’ve been saying! Koga-kun, who’s always standing next to Seiran-kun, is as good as garbage to me! He’s such a nuisance. He should just dispose of himself and disappear! It’s really pissing me off~!”

Oh my god, I’m really going to cry.

By no means did I know that there was such a love brained, backstabbing, foul-mouthed woman in our group.

I don’t know if I can smoothly get along with her in future. This person’s personality is a little too bad…

“Haha…….”

With a sigh, I put the phone to my ear.

Well, in terms of bad character──── sad to say, I’m better than you.

“After all. Did you hear that, Seiran?”

“Huh!?”

Narushima-san instantly turned pale the moment she saw me talking into my phone.

“What? Didn’t you hear me well? Then I’ll say it once more. Narushima-san said that I’m garbage, and she wants to dispose of me as soon as possible…”

“Hey! Hey! Hey! Wait! Wait! Eh? Hah!?”

“Oh, this voice? Yeah, it’s Yoru Narushima. I was so surprised. I didn’t know she could speak this loudly. She’s been acting completely like a cat in our school.”

“Why are you speaking to Seiran-kun over the phone!? Hey, give that to me!”

Narushima-san jumped at me in a panic. I pulled the phone away from my ear and stuck my tongue out.

“It’s a lie.”

“….What?”

I pointed my finger towards Narushima-san, who was still looking frightened.

“Idiot! Idiot! You fell for it! Did you really think I’d let Seiran hear what you said?”

“────You little brat.”

Oh, she’s incredibly angry. If she had a knife, to my great regret, she’d probably stab me without any hesitation.

Anyway, my prediction was right on target. As expected, she wants to feign innocence in front of Seiran. So that Seiran will have the desire to protect her.

Narushima-san purposely approached me with her true nature in order to take out her pent up stress on me. She was trying to set her pace with her confident attitude, devising means to get my support so that she could be his girlfriend.

After that, I’m sure she was going to say, 

“I’ll make it work, so keep that part of mine a secret.♪”

But she miscalculated very badly.

After all, I never intended to get a girlfriend in the first place.

“……I’ll break your jaw.”

Narushima raised her fist into the air dangerously while saying so.

“W-Wait a minute, is it okay for you to do that? What if I tell Seiran that Narushima-san was acting like a cat in front of everyone?”

“There’s no way they’re going to believe that. No matter how long Koga-kun and the others have known each other.”

Narushima-san took a step back. The look on her face was enough to tell me that she was frightened.

“Well, I guess so. Narushima-san’s beguiling innocence is nothing but perfect. But if I say so, Seiran will at least have some suspicion. He has a discerning eye for change, so wouldn’t you be extremely troubled?”

Narushima-san then launched a counterattack.

“Then I’ll tell everyone that Koga-kun likes Honoko-chan! Koga-kun, who wants to take care of the group, would be troubled with that, wouldn’t he?”

“Oh, that’s definitely troubling. But if that happens, Narushima-san’s true nature will be revealed, and we’ll just go back to the original three guys. I like the current five of us, but if that happens, there’s nothing I can do about it.”

Narushima-san likes Seiran and wants to close the distance to him.

I like Asagiri-san, but I don’t want to close the distance between us.

We’re at an obvious stand.

“The lowest…you’re even more bratty than I imagined you to be….Koga-kun’s character is the worst!”

“Yeah. I even think so myself…but? What gives you the right to tell me what to do, you fake normie with breasts! I take it that those huge breasts of yours are a sham too!?”

“Breasts…it’s the real thing! This stupid small fry, virgin, Koga-kun! Koga-kun the small fry!”

That’s the first time anyone ever slandered me. That’s relatively interesting, isn’t it?

“You know. Can I ask you something?”

“What!?”

“What makes you think I didn’t record it?”

I showed her my phone again.

Narushima-san gasped “Huh?”

“Y-You were recording…?”

“No, of course not.”

“This crude fish man! Die for real! I’m going to take off your pants, and you’re going to die!”

“Sorry…well, even if I didn’t record it, I can just say it tomorrow, and it’ll be the same.”

“W-wait. Don’t do that.”

Only her frightened face was still like a normal small animal.

“What can I do to prevent you from telling them…?”

“As long as we stay the same as always.”

I finally managed to say the words I wanted to say and smiled to reassure her.

“I can’t blame Narushima-san for hating me, but I still really like the time I spent with those five people. So I hope you can continue to be normal with me. At least in front of everyone.”

Narushima-san rubbed her eyes. Apparently, she seemingly cried.

I…might have overdone it. Because I’m the type of person, who takes things seriously. Let’s be honest and reflect on that…….

“O-Okay. I hate Koga-kun so much that I don’t even want to see his face anymore, but I’ll do my best.”

“O-oh, then…please treat me well.”

“But I won’t give up on Seiran-kun.”

“I know. I don’t think the five of us can stay together forever. So I’ll try not to get in the way of your love life as much as possible. I’m really sorry for everything.”

“As much as possible, what?”

Narushima-san, who still had tears in the corners of his eyes, glared up at me.

“No, that’s just a figure of speech. I won’t do it again. For now, why don’t we make up?”

I held out my right hand, and she grasped it nervously.

This was the first time I held a girl’s hand.

It was, as they say, fluffy and soft. It was sticky and had the feel of a hard stick────

“Hey- Owowowowo!”

I broke off the handshake, and the ice cream stick that Narushima-san had eaten up was stuck to my right hand.

“Mmm-hmm. This is revenge for picking on me.”

That smile…I take it that cry of yours was a lie too, wasn’t it…!?

“Well then, Koga-kun. As you know, I’m going to confess my feelings to Seiran-kun before long.”

“Ah, yeah, that thing, but can you wait just a bit? Of course, I’m not saying that you shouldn’t confess. Just a little while longer, at least until summer comes to an end….!”

We’ve got big plans for this summer, for all of us to play together.

This is the first and last summer that the five of us will surely spend together as we are now. It will be a great project that colors that summer.

So at least, up until that point, I want to be in a group of close friends that has nothing to do with love.

I was hoping she’d at least wait to confess until I’d executed my plan────That’s what I thought.

“That’s none of my business, is it?”

Of course, my selfish and ephemeral wish was slashed away.

“Koga-kun seems to value the relationship of his group like his body, but I don’t care about that. I’ll confess at my own timing, and if that doesn’t work out, I’ll just leave and find someone else. That’s all.”

And then Narushima-san took a glance at the ice cream stick that was stuck to my hand during the handshake.

“What happened today is a secret between us. Promise me you’ll keep it.”

She deliberately stared at me and showed an impish smile, licking her lips, something that she’s never shown at school before.

“What’s….going to become of…this summer?”

After I parted from Narushima-san, I muttered to myself, succumbing to heavy anxiety.

I looked at the ice cream that was still on my palm.

The ice cream, which was exposed to the hot July sun, had already begun to dry out. But the stickiness was still there.

I didn’t have a handkerchief, so I tried to wipe it with the hem of my uniform, but I hesitated.

I did the same as Narushima-san and gently licked it off with my tongue.

In the depths of the bitterness caused by my own sweaty hands, there was a sweetness that seemed to melt.

It was proof that I had shared my “first secret” with Yoru Narushima, and it was a taste I would never forget.

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