Chapter 20: of Magic Growth: Growing Magic

"This is a problem, what do we do now?"

"I think we should call Ria..."

"The magician woman?"

"She knows how to deal with this..."

"Nn..."

The conclusion: Alcohol was dangerous.

I could only be glad that it wasn't me who overdid it. Really glad.

"I'll get someone to call for her. Yumi, take care he doesn't do anything stupid."

"I'll try."

Wanda left me alone with our little problem. I was slightly intoxicated as well but at least I was still in a state where I could make reasonable decisions. This guy in front of me wasn't. That was also probably why he was now trying to get up.

"Lie down."

"I'm... fine...! No need... to worry... Rea... Rear... Really?"

"That's what every drunk person says. Just lie down."

I pushed him back down. Some of the less drunk soldiers were watching with glee as I tried to restrain this idiot.

"Girly, if ya need help just tell us. We'd be happy to take care of that brat for ya!"

"I can still handle this fine. Just take care you don't end up like him."

"Gahaha! Where's the fun in drinking if nobody drops to the floor?"

"That's right! That's the good part!"

I watched how these irresponsible soldiers began laughing and making fun of our dead drunk guy. I couldn't really blame them. It was his own fault and he had completely overestimated his tolerance. After he challenged the older soldiers it was only their right to laugh at him.

Still, it was irresponsible of them. They knew very well in advance it would end up like this.

"The brat has to learn the line between courage and foolishness. If he doesn't, he'll never gain the respect he needs for his position!" explained a different soldier to me.

Honestly, I agreed with him. Even I had understood quickly how this would end.

"He may be skilled, but he's still green. The captain sees potential in him, most of us old coots do, and he does live up to most of our expectations. But if he's too perfect, that's just as bad as not being able to do anything!"

"That's right! If he doesn't learn his limits, he'll have to pay dearly for it!"

A few others shouted their agreement and hearty laughter broke out again.

Those are great lines and I would be totally in agreement. If it weren't about a drinking contest...

I just had to question the actual use of teaching him his limits in regards to drinking. I doubted he would be on the battlefield, dead drunk.

"Ya doubting us, little girly?"

"Well... Nn. I just can't see where the drinking contest comes in there..."

"Then, let me ask ya a simple question: What happens if the alarm goes off now?"

"... Ah."

If the alarm went off, this idiot would still be dead drunk. They were right.

"Well, it doesn't matter if some of us drop to the floor, but our dear vice-captain is a different matter! Gahahaha!"

"..."

Give me back all my appreciation I had just now.

A sigh escaped me as I listened to their antics. I wanted to hold my head.

"Yumi!"

A nearby shout caught my attention. Wanda returned together with the magician woman Ria.

"How's he doing?"

"Nn, not good?"

"Really, what idiot gets riled up and forced into a drinking bout."

"... Let me see."

The woman, Ria, squatted down next to him. It looked like she was examining him but I couldn't see much outside of her holding her hand on him. Maybe she used magic? I couldn't see it, at the very least.

"Mh... He's drunk."

"Thanks, but we called you because he is..."

Wanda couldn't repress her snarky comment.

"I'll use magic."

"Please do..."

"Nn? She can use magic to sober him up?"

That sounded interesting. If magic was able to sober you up, you could get dead drunk without big worries and use magic to just get back to normal.

Actually, that sounded like a horrible idea. I was sure I would only misuse it to drink more.

"She can, but... Well, you will see."

"Nn?"

In contrast, that didn't sound like anything great either but before I could inquire what she meant, the mana surrounding us stirred a bit. It flowed towards Ria's hand that she held over him. It was a gentle and slow flow. It made me feel warm just by watching.

And yet, despite the gentle warm feeling, the recipient was everything but gentle. After a few seconds, he began groaning in pain.

"Gahhhh! It! Hurts! Make it! Stop!"

His pain filled shouts echoed through our ears. It wasn't pleasant.

"Wanda, what is happening?"

"The best reason you don't want to get drunk enough that you need to be treated."

"... I could guess that already. So, what is happening?"

"Ask Ria. I only know that it is definitely one of the worst feelings you'll ever get to experience. My guarantee on that one. It's like experiencing the whole drunkenness and the hangover compressed into a few seconds. And then you make it a few figures worse and you probably got it."

"... I will make sure I won't ever get this drunk."

While we spoke Ria had finished her treatment and stood up again.

"Mh... I won't treat you just because you are drunk... Unless it is an emergency," she told me.

"I think I don't want to take that chance regardless."

"Mh. I believe that is better as well."

She nodded a few times in agreement. Then she looked down on our newly sobered-up victim.

"He'll be up in a few minutes. If there's anyone else drunk, I'll treat them now."

The entire celebration froze abruptly with those words. All the old soldiers stopped dead in their tracks.

The one soldier that was talking with me just a minute before slowly stepped forward.

"No, Ria dear, there's no need to treat us. We're all clear enough, right! Everyone?! GIVE ME AN ANSWER!"

"We're fine! Everyone's sober!"

"All good here, Miss Ria!"

"Nothing to worry about!"

It took no time for all of them to gain a clear head again. It told me a lot about how scared they were of the treatment.

"Mh... Well, I'll let it slide this time. Only this time."

They breathed a sigh of relief upon hearing those words.

"Then, I'll return to the infirmary... Ah."

Ria wanted to take her leave before she stopped and turned to me.

"The girl, Lily, was looking for you."

And then she left.

"Maybe we should clean up before someone else drops down... What are you going to do, Yumi?"

"Nn... Don't know."

"Not going to go to that walking disaster?"

"..."

"It's better to get it out of the way earlier."

"Those are bold words for someone who invited me to drown in alcohol."

"It worked, didn't it?"

"Uhh... Still."

"You don't hate her, do you? Then just go over to her. She's surely worried."

"..."

Worried, was it. She probably was. I could imagine it well. But my stubborn side told me to just let her be worried, that it was her own fault. Even though I knew I shouldn't be like that, I was rather angry at that time. And it was a bit hard to just go to her and pretend everything was fine.

"Jeez, just go and make up with her."

"You say that so easily..."

"I know it's not easy. But you don't want to depart now and worry everyone with your little fight, do you?"

"That is..."

"Just go."

She pushed my back. She was right. I took a deep breath.

"Ugh, my head hurts..."

"... Merim, shut up for a minute, would you?"

Wanda held her head in response to his timing.

Merim, our previously dead drunk idiot, slowly heaved himself up. Still suffering from the aftereffects he held his head and groaned.

"You reap what you sow."

He looked slightly confused when he spotted us next to him.

"You two... What happened...?"

"... Wanda, if he's like this, he won't even learn from it, will he?"

"I guess not."

"Seriously, you two... Why does my head hurt..."

I shook my head in exasperation.

"Leave this idiot to me, Yumi."

"Nn... Okay..."

Slightly reluctantly I agreed.

"I'll go then."

"Good Luck."

"Nn... Thanks."

Facing someone after you had a fight, even if it was a small one, was hard. Even if you knew you had to, you still couldn't bring yourself to face them. Especially if you thought it wasn't your fault but theirs.

Still, getting angry was something I slightly regretted. I didn't want to shout at her but I was just so overcome in the heat of the moment that I simply did.

I was walking around the camp, a bit aimlessly, half hoping I would just miss her, half knowing that this wasn't what I should do.

While strolling around I was spotted by someone.

"Miss Yumi, what are you doing here?"

"Oh, you are..."

... What was her name? I know she was leading that women's squad, but I don't think I ever caught her name, did I?

Thankfully, she realised quickly what the problem was.

"Ah, I never introduced myself, did I? I am sorry about that. My name is Fenna. I lead the female combat unit."

"Fenna is it... Nice to meet you, even though it is belated."

"It is, I am sorry about that. So, are you looking for something or did you lose your way? The camp is large and chaotic, so it is hard to get around."

If it was chaotic enough that you acknowledged it yourself, why didn't someone plan it out properly then?

"Ah, no... not quite... Well, I guess you could say I am looking for Lily..."

"Miss Lily? I think I saw her a moment ago with our guests from the Black Guard? Want me to show you the way?"

"Ah, it is enough if I know where to go, thank you."

"No need to be shy, I'll gladly lead the way!"

She slowly inched closer and I thought I could see a small sparkle in her eyes. I prayed it was just my imagination.

"Eh... Well, then I'll take you up... on that offer?"

"Leave it to me!" she declared with vigour.

Don't be so enthusiastic over that!

Shelving my inner retort I coughed once and motioned her to lead the way.

For some reason, she took it upon herself to tell me about the camp, the various tents and their uses and a bit about the rudimentary command structure in the band. Frankly, I was still slightly intoxicated and couldn't bother about it right now, so it went from one ear in and out the other.

I still nodded in between to pretend I was still listening.

"... and that tent is where we... Oh? We're already here?"

"Nn? Is this where Lily is?"

"I did see her here last, at least."

I still had no idea where I was but there were a few black-clothed men here. I didn't notice it earlier but they weren't wearing the black heavy armour we saw before, but only black leather equipment or even simply cloth shirts and pants. But all in black. They must have really liked that colour.

"Excuse me, we're looking for Lily."

Fenna stopped one of the men.

"Little Lily? I think she went off with our Captain somewhere. Hey guys, someone knows where Little Lily went?!"

He turned around asking the other men. But they called her 'Little Lily'? How cute. I should tease her with that later.

"I think I saw her and the Captain going to the storage there. Bet he'll scold her!"

"Oh yeah, she was acting quite cheeky, didn't she?"

"That she did! Gahahaha."

They all laughed in unison. She got scolded? I wondered why. I couldn't think of anything bad she did. Maybe we should wait for it to end, but maybe she wasn't even being scolded.

"Well, then let's take a look!"

Fenna, unperturbed about my inner conflict, walked straight in the direction we were pointed. I could feel some men pointing curious gazes at me but I couldn't bother about it right now. I quickly hurried after Fenna.

"Let's see, around here?"

"Miss Fenna, wait a moment."

"Oh, found them!"

And with those words, completely ignoring me, she turned around a corner behind a tent, a rather deserted place, where nobody would bother to look.

What we found, froze us in place.

"Papa! I already said I'm sorry!"

"Dear, you can't just go and treat 'sorry' as the go-to for all your problems. You have to properly reflect on your mistakes."

"But I am, Papa..."

"Then you shouldn't have a problem with reflecting for some more."

We found an adorable but odd father-daughter pair. But they were not the ones we were looking for. The tall, old man with grey hair and a short beard was clothed in the black equipment like the other Black Guards were, he clearly looked human. The young girl on the other side was only clothed in a long beige-coloured shirt slash dress that went down to her knees. Additionally, fluffy ears peeked out from her dark blueish hair and I could spot something black occasionally showing itself from the hem of her dress. The dark blueish colour gave the impression that it was weakly glowing in a different colour. Every time she moved the glow slightly changed colour as if it was influenced by the way the sun hit her hair.

Oh, a manakin girl, maybe? From Karen's explanation, it didn't seem like there were many others so I didn't expect to see another one here. But more importantly... I wanna fluff those ears.

By the time my observation ended the two had spotted Fenna and me as well. The father showed some surprise. On the other hand, the girl was in a complete state of panic. Not surprising, I could understand how embarrassing it was when others saw your parents scolding you.

"Ah, I'm sorry, I think we got the wrong people," apologised Fenna. And then we turned around and left. Or at least we tried to if I hadn't spotted something familiar lying behind the father. It was some leather equipment and a bunch of swords with one of them sticking out like a sore thumb due to its size.

I looked over to the girl again. My first impression was someone unfamiliar but after looking closer I realised that she did resemble someone I knew well. Except that the person in question hadn't ever shown me such a panicked expression with tears in her eyes.

Cute... No wait, that's not the problem right now!

I wasn't quite sure how I should deal with this right now.

"You are... Miss Yumi?" asked the man, bringing me back to reality.

"Nn? Ah... Nn. I am Yumi."

"I see."

He looked over me, appraising me as if I was a rare and curious object. Then he turned over to the girl.

And hit her head with quite some force, that we could hear the sound from his fist hitting her.

"Ouch! Why did you hit me now, Pa... Old man?!"

"They already heard you anyway, there's no use in pretending now."

"Uhh..."

"In any case, I think before you complain to me, you should first do something else, shouldn't you, you idiot daughter?"

"But..."

"No buts!"

Unyielding, he shoved her in front of us, or rather me. She froze and awkwardly averted her gaze. It was so cute that I decided to tease her a bit.

"Is something the matter, Miss...?"

Maybe the pressure was too much for her, she turned to me, unable to say anything, her mouth opening and closing as if she were a fish. I smiled and waited.

"Ah... Ah... This... This..."

She tried to say something.

"This... Is... This is... Impossible!"

And dashed out of sight with tears in her eyes, leaving a dumfounded Fenna, an old father shaking his head and me behind.

"That girl... Really... I'm really sorry about that."

"It's okay. It was cute and not something I'd usually see her doing..."

"So you did realise after all. I knew it."

"Well, I don't know many girls keeping a dozen swords with her..."

"... So her own posing already betrayed her..."

He again shook his head in exasperation. It must have been hard, being a father.

"Really, I'm sorry about our girl. Please take care of her in the future."

He lowered his head, but something bothered me about that request.

"I have one question..."

"Yes? If I can answer it I'll be glad to."

"Why did you decide to refuse Korwen's offer to join?"

From the short exchange that I saw, I could only see an awkward father with his daughter. They clearly got along well. And yet, why did they decide to push her away? I couldn't understand it. Was their honour that important?

"Why, you ask? That is quite a tough question... You see, the girl has to see the world, she can't always cling to us, so sometimes you have to push them away so they leave the nest."

"Mh... As expected, I don't get it."

"When you get older, you surely will."

"Maybe, but right now, it just looks stupid. If she has to see the world, why don't you show it to her yourself?"

"We're mercenaries, we never know when death comes to us. Different bands work in different ways and if she stays with us she will only see our work. She has to find what is best for her, and if she can, find work that isn't about fighting. That girl isn't suited to fighting."

She did seem pretty happy about fighting, though. My first impression of her was rather savage.

Maybe it showed on my face that I still wasn't satisfied with that explanation, as he smiled wryly.

"I still don't get what that has to do with refusing Korwen's offer. Is it so much more important that you make her feel sad and lonely? I think I get why she didn't want to come and say her farewells. She knew you were stubborn."

Maybe I should apologise to her. In the end, she was right. I didn't know anything. And yet, it just made me feel even angrier than I already was.

She didn't want to part with them. That was why she refused to say her farewell because it would just hurt her. And this idiot didn't make it better.

"We're all old men, we aren't good for much anymore. Most of us can barely keep fighting. We'll be lucky if we can make it through the next few years. But at least she won't be caught up then. And she won't have to see us at our worst."

"I don't think Korwen would just make that offer if he hadn't some idea. I doubt he thinks you all as useless."

"Ha! We know ourselves better than he does. We know what we still can do and what we can't."

"And her? Do you really think it'll be best to leave her just alone?"

"I told you already, it's the best for everyone."

I furrowed my brows in anger. Stubborn old man.

"I can't accept that. It just looks to me that you're ignoring what she actually wants."

"She'll accept it in time. In some years she'll surely have forgotten about us old men."

He said she wasn't suited for fighting, yet he didn't say anything that she joined Korwen's mercenaries. If he wanted her to find something else, then shouldn't he just take it up in his own hands and guide her?

"Miss Yumi, maybe you should calm down..." whispered Fenna next to me.

Ah, no good. I'm getting worked up again, aren't I?

"Nn, sorry about that."

I faced at the idiot father in front of me.

"Barely a week ago I lost everything I had, my friends, my family, everything. I don't want Lily to experience the same. And even less do I want her to forget those that are important to her. You're just a bunch of stubborn old men that are too cowardly to face her."

I turned on my heels and left. If I stayed, it would never end.

Ah... I'm getting really irritated. I shouldn't get so worked up so quickly. I was so quick to get angry with Lily as well. I wonder what is wrong...

I massaged my temple as I aimless walked along the trampled path between the tents. I should look for Lily. As she was, she was sure to attract a lot of attention.

"Miss Yumi! Miss Yumi, wait!"

Fenna was shouting from behind me, running in my direction. She was holding something.

"Oh, sorry for just leaving you there."

"No need to mind it, Miss Yumi. More importantly, Mr Greyward handed me this. He told me to give them to you."

"This? A pendant? And a letter?"

"Yes, he said the pendant is Miss Lily's, it contains the magic that she uses to, well, hide. The letter is apparently for you, Miss Yumi."

"For me? But I can't even read? Who would send me a letter?"

Why would someone give me a letter? Not to mention, I didn't even know anyone who would send me one.

"Huh, he said he was told to give the letter to the Witchkin, apparently. He said it was really important, so you should at least open it."

"Witchkin?"

"I don't know either."

Some weird thing popped up again. And why would he give it to me then? I didn't know any witches.

"Nn? He wants me to 'open it up'? Not 'read it'?"

"He said it like that, yes."

"That's a weird way to phrase it. Well, I guess I can at least take a look."

I took the envelope and carefully opened it. These didn't always have to contain a written letter, so for all I knew it could really be something intended for me.

What fell into my hands were two weirdly stiff and thick pieces of papers.

I couldn't believe what I was looking at.

You are reading story Taboo Journal at novel35.com

"What are those? Oh, those look good. They're really well-made."

"..."

I put them back into the envelope. What should I do now?

"Fenna."

"Yes?"

"What should I do?"

"Eh? Why does that question come up now? Eh, looking for Miss Lily? Didn't you want to, eh, help her?"

"..."

Yes, I did. Taking a deep breath I decided.

"Let's continue looking for Lily."

"Ah... So, what were those? I have never seen pictures that well-drawn. I heard there's magic that can make realistic pictures, was it like that?"

"... Those weren't drawn but it wasn't magic either... They are called photos."

"Photos?"

"Nn. You could say, they capture a moment?"

"That sounds nice."

"It does..."

Except I couldn't understand why they were here. Did photography exist here? I wouldn't be surprised but then one of them made no sense.

I took a glance at the envelope in my hand. One photo was showing a small wooden hut that was on the verge of a breakdown.

The other showed a modern family house.

"Where the heck did you run off to, Lily..."

We couldn't find her. She did leave plenty of trails. After all, a bawling young girl as conspicuous as her drew attention. We narrowed down the area where she should be, close to the training fields where I practised with the crossbow, but we still couldn't spot her.

"Miss Yumi, I can't find her at all..."

"Neither can I..."

I was sure we checked every spot in this area but our search ended fruitlessly. I had an idea how to draw her out but that wasn't the best idea right now.

"Lily! Lily, come out," I shouted through the area.

Some mercenaries looked at me full of curiosity but I ignored them. There was still no answer.

Guess I'll have to resort to this...

"... If you come out, I'll be your body pillow tonight!"

"Miss Yumi? That sounds like a rather questionable offer."

I waited for a moment, but still no answer.

"Guess that didn't work, either."

"I would be surprised if she was enticed by such an offer."

In the meantime, I was surprised she wasn't enticed by it. Just as stubborn as that old man, she was.

"If you come out now, I'll try to convince Karen and Rina that we'll all sleep together tonight."

I tried spicing up the offer a bit. I waited around a minute until I heard small rustling sound behind me.

"... Really?"

"Nn, really."

"You aren't mad?"

"Mad? Because you lied to us?"

"Uhh..."

She backed away again.

"Not really, well, I'm not. And I don't think Karen will be either. I mean, even if you say so, we met just yesterday. I'm not blaming you for that."

Not to mention that Maya and Emily were hiding it too and Korwen told me also why they were doing it. There wasn't a particular reason to be angry, was there?

I walked over to her and she reflexively backed away. A bit annoyed I jumped forward to catch her.

"Wah! That's dangerous!"

"You caught me just fine so it's okay."

"That's not making okay..."

I giggled at her reaction.

"Still though, you give quite a different impression like this."

"... Do I?"

Her face clouded over. Maybe she didn't have good experiences with it?

"Quite, yes. But I like it."

"You... like it?"

"Yes, the tear-stained face, the panicked expression and the clear adoration for your Papa, it was great. I like it."

Her face became redder with each point and I worried she would reach unthinkable red colours if I continued.

"... Forget it. Please... Forget it."

"I don't think I can, sorry."

"Uhhh..."

"Ahahaha... Sorry. But enough about that. There's something I want to ask you."

"Ask me? If it's something I can answer, I'll be glad to."

"... Ah, yes. Are you fine with them just leaving?"

"..."

Her expression turned downright crestfallen. Just as expected, she wasn't.

"You should just tell them, honestly. Just shout it into his face you don't want them to."

"They won't listen to me... I'm just their 'Little Lily'."

Ah, that name was cute. I could understand why they called her that after I saw her tears.

Yet, I could also understand why Lily had a problem with it.

"And I already tried telling them..."

"And they said no?"

"Yes..."

"Mhm... Then just say it again."

"Yumi... That's not how it works."

"It is. Just say it, until they listen. Just vent it out on them. They are idiots for not listening to this cute girl."

"... That sounds more like you want me to throw a tantrum..."

"If it works, why not..."

"Huh?"

"Do you prefer them just leaving like that?"

"But they'd never take me seriously again if I did that..."

"So you rather have them treat you like an adult and they'll leave? Why are both of you so stubborn."

"I don't want them to leave! But..."

I put my arms behind her back and gave her a soft hug.

"They are the ones who raised you, right? They'll always see you as a child anyway, so why not just be selfish like a child now?"

"But..."

"If you don't want to, that's fine too. They'll just leave then, won't they..."

"... You're unfair."

"I am fine with being unfair if the people around me are happy because of it."

"You're really unfair... I think I can understand Karen's feelings."

"Nn? What does Sis have to do with that?"

"Nothing... Thank you, Yumi."

She returned the hug and then leaned slightly forward. I could feel something soft on my forehead.

"If a throwing a tantrum works then I'll swallow my adult pride! But only for today!"

Then she let go and turned around.

"I think you're more suited to be an older sister, rather than a younger one."

And she left. I touched my forehead, the spot where she kissed me.

"An older sister, huh... Don't make our small family even more complicated than it already is, Little Lily."

With a wry smile, I turned towards Fenna, who had watched silently from the side.

"She forgot her pendant, could you bring it to her for me?"

"Eh? Why not give it to her yourself?"

"There's somewhere I have to go, I'll be back later."

"Then shouldn't you hold onto it and give it to her later? I won't do that for you."

"How mean... Guess I'll have to then."

I looked for a place to put the pendant into but I couldn't find anything where I could put it into. I'd just have to carry it like this until I had my pouch.

"Then, thank you for helping me."

"No need to thank me. I saw some nice things, so I consider it worth it."

She gave me a thumbs up. Just what did she think was worth?

"Rather, you should make sure you're back in time. Should I tell the Captain?"

"Nn, please do."

"Got it, then, have a nice trip."

"Thanks."

I walked away from the practice fields, went to the tent where I woke up at, grabbed my robe and a pouch and sneaked out of the mercenary camp.

This was something I had to do alone. 

The slums were full of life. A lot more than the days prior. Many people were running around, often forgetting to cover their faces with the hoods of their robes. Some pulled their families along, some their lovers. They all knew something had happened. Their oppressors were gone.

I didn't know what had happened exactly when Lily and Karen saved the girls and barely anyone could even guess what had happened after we escaped, but the result was obvious. The lord was gone. The hoodlums were gone. The danger was gone, mostly. People sought a better life and now was their best chance at it.

I walked down the streets and the alleyways. I didn't know the way as well as Karen did, not even remotely, but I knew them well enough to reach my destination. On the way, I even spotted the old men that distributed food to those in need. I had no idea where the food came from or why they distributed it, but many people were thankful to them. And I was glad they didn't have to pay with their lives. Now, they could once again help everyone here.

I reached a more deserted part of the slums. Only a few people walked around here but still more than usual. The buildings all looked like they might collapse any second, some were only holding together because something else prevented them from falling over.

It didn't take long for me to find my way to my destination. A small wooden hut with only a single room. I spent the majority of the week in this little room. Thinking back, I was in quite an embarrassing state. With barely any clothes on my body, I scraped for whatever food I could find together with Karen. Then in our moment of need, we found a solution. We got food and hope. Karen took a gamble to save her sister. And she won. I was also now posing as her little sister. Lily said I would still need to be her little sister, yet Rina looked energetic and fine. But only time could tell the scars she would carry with her from now on.

We also had a little embarrassing incident at the river. Later Lily carried me like a child and thanks to Wanda and Merim I had made a decision to protect Karen. And it wasn't just Karen who I wanted to protect. Seeing Lily I understood, that she was also still someone that needed protection as well. I couldn't leave her alone. She might be strong on the outside but she was still young on the inside. Not that I was actually that much older.

But I was powerless. Without power, I couldn't protect them. I was only here due to the hard work of many others. I did all I could, of course. I wasn't going to say that my work amounted to nothing. Alas, it was too small. I was, simply speaking, weak. I wanted to be stronger. And yet, I also didn't. Power was a scary thing. The ogres had power. The thugs had power. The church had power. And they all misused it. If I gained power, would I end up like them? Even if I didn't, the power I gained would bring changes. Changes, I might not want. Still, if I didn't look for it, I was likely to regret it.

It was a truly conflicting feeling. Wanting power yet not. Wanting to protect yet be protected.

I had fun with Emily, Maya and Sele. Even though they were around half my age, I got along well with them. They truly made me feel like a chick that still hadn't left the nest of its parents. It was warm and comfortable. It made you think that everything will be fine, even if you didn't do anything.

"But, I can't allow that, can I..."

I stood in front of the wooden door. It was rotting at the corners and a good push was likely to break it down. Carefully, I extended my hand and pushed it open.

The inside of the hut was small. The walls were broken, you could partly see the sky from a hole. And inside this small hut, someone was waiting for me.

"Welcome, my dear Yumi."

A high-pitched voice, clear like a bell. Yet, it gave a sense of unease. Like you're facing something you shouldn't.

"... Are you the one who sent me these photos?"

"That, I am. Did you enjoy them?"

I looked at the figure in front of me. I couldn't see much of their face except the smile. A wide smile. They were small, even smaller than I was, clothed in black. A black cone hat with a large brim hid the face. They were clothed like a witch that was popular in modern fiction. Additionally, I could see their pink hair flowing down to the waist.

"I can't say I enjoyed them... Where did you get these from?"

"My, I made them?"

The figure lifted the brim of the hat and I could now see their face clearly. A small girl with pink eyes and hair of the same colour. And a creepy, unmoving smile. For some reason, it sent a shiver down my spine.

"You made them... just... who are you?"

"Who am I, you ask? My, what a simple question, yet, it is hard to answer it. Truly, how should I go about it?"

"... Just get to the point."

"Not very talkative, are we? How sad. Your mother is truly sad."

"You aren't my mother."

"Oh my, is this puberty? Must be that. Rebellious phase, I heard of it before. How saddening."

"... Are you trying to make fun of me?"

"A bit, yes. Enjoyment is important, you see. Especially if you've lived some time."

Through the entire exchange, her expression hadn't changed even once. Her tone might have changed, sounding sad, disappointed or astonished, but her face betrayed all of that.

"Well, before you run away, I guess I'll introduce myself."

She lifted the hem of what looked like a skirt and curtsied.

"I have many names and many titles, but you probably heard of me as Yumias la Freyr, the Grand Witch."

"... Are you the one Lily talked about?"

"Oh, Little Lily? Yes, she's a cute girl, isn't she? Still such a papa girl. She used to be that attached to me as well. There was even a time she called me mama. Oh, that made me happy."

She stopped and her eyes stared right into mine.

"But that's not what you want to hear, right?"

"... Why... do you have that photo... That photo of the other... world?"

"Because I took it, simple as that."

"What do you mean, took it?"

"I went over, used a photo camera, made the photo, printed it out and brought it along. Ah, but of course I first made a photo from this hut. I didn't want to make two trips."

"... But... how?"

"How what? How I made the photos? Or... how I went to the other world?"

I could feel myself stiffening. She knew what I wanted to hear but she was messing around all she could.

"Well, well, you see. Mh, I guess I should give you a little lesson first."

"Lesson?"

"Yes, a lesson, my dear. You see, everything is a bit, let's say, complex. You know there exist two worlds. But in truth, there exists a plethora of different worlds. Hundreds, thousands, tens of thousands! And you see, they are forming a ring. Or rather multiple ones. A smaller ring is surrounded by a slightly larger one. Well, actually this is three-dimensional, so... maybe shell is a better word?  Hmm..."

She was lost in thought for a moment, then she shrugged her shoulders.

"Whatever, the point is, you have layers. Yes, that's actually a good word, layers around a core. Anyway, these layers have a little kind of relationship. The outer layers are weak and brittle, far away from the source, the source that grants them their souls, their magic, their very existence, yes. The farther away the layer is, the less the worlds in that layer gain from the source. Now, your world wasn't particularly far away, it's just one layer further away than this world, but it is still in a different layer. In a layer farther from the source, no less."

She gestured exaggeratingly, trying to show a core and its layers.

"Now, the source grants them magic and souls, that's a very subtle, very weak and slow progress. But one day, the source would run out of power like that, right? So, it takes back some of that energy at a similarly slow but steady rate. Now, these flows can be ridden, you see. And by riding them you can go to the outer layers or the inner layers. Unfortunately, you won't be able to return to your world like that. Just telling you in advance."

"What do you mean?"

"Your soul has become too strong already."

"Too strong?"

"Yes, too strong. If you were to enter the world like that, the world would try to destroy you. And that would be the end for you. The ultimate end. Your soul goes poof!"

She motioned a sphere and the exaggeratedly showed it bursting, accompanied by a popping sound she made.

"If you were to go to the inner layers, no problem, but the outer layers are too much for you. Your soul would need to grow even stronger to make sure the world can't get rid of you. And that would take hundreds, or more like thousands of years. Maybe even tens of thousands. I don't know."

"So basically, if I go there, I'd die."

"Yes."

Was all this exposition on it really necessary then?

I kept my complaint. Still, it might be of some use maybe that she told me this. One day, maybe.

"Ah, but if you miss your family, I can bring them over, yeah? They won't be able to go back either, but you just need to take care of them, right?"

"You! Don't you dare do that!"

"So you don't want to see them anymore? You've been so heroically talking about family and saying your goodbye just earlier, didn't you?"

"That's something different."

"Is it, though? Well, I won't force you. Actually, you have no say in the matter anyway, so there's nothing to force."

"... Keep my family out of this."

"My, you don't even remember them yet you are so overprotective. How precious. And for all you know... Maybe they are already here?"

"You!"

I took a step forward and Yumias started laughing, holding her stomach.

"Ahahaha, you're great. It was just a joke, a joke, my dear. My, how nice. But really, dear. That's not all you want to know, right? There are still other things, aren't there? Things you are dying to know?"

This girl was absolutely messing with me. But she was also the only source of information I had right now. I had to control myself. If I didn't, I might never get a chance again.

"... Who was it... that... changed me... and how did I come here?"

"Oh, my. That answer is simple. Me. And me."

"... What?"

"Ah, you see. I was bored and I saw this cute young man spouting some stupid stuff like 'Ahhh, I want to be a cute little girl in my next life!'"

She tried impersonating a man's voice.

"Actually, sounded more like a stupid pervert. But well, I thought, if he wanted to be one that much that he asked to be a little girl in his next life, why not grant it to him now? So I did, yes."

I was speechless. Because of such a stupid reason? She just did it... out of a whim?

"Well, I understand that many make wishes like that, yes? I mean, I heard even more ridiculous ones, way more ridiculous ones. One guy wanted to be someone else's testicle. Like, what? Well, he's now a testicle as he wanted. Just not a human's. I hope he's happy."

"... Do you always play with people like that?"

"My, no. Only on rare occasions. Even I know it's not a nice thing to do. But sometimes you want to make a little bit of mischief, no?"

"I don't think this counts as a 'little bit of mischief'"

"My, don't be such a killjoy. Aren't you pretty happy right now?"

"That is..."

"I can assure you one thing, you're currently happier than before."

"Eh?"

"My, my, you don't remember? Oh right, your memories are gone. Mhm, I remember. Mh, that's a bit of a problem, yes. I forgot to pay attention to that detail. That requires some adjustments in my plan, doesn't it?"

"... What plans?!"

Was she planning on messing even more with me?

"Oh, no need to be so alarmed. I'll mostly let you do your own thing. I did intervene a bit, yes, here and there. I mean, I did drop you at a place with Little Lily and the Silver Guide. I made sure you got into an environment where you wouldn't die immediately. Aren't I nice? Aren't I good? Aftercare is my speciality!"

Listening to this girl was giving me headaches. Did she seriously believe in all of that?

"Who is the Silver Guide?"

"Ah, that. You know, how in a game there's often this character at the beginning that guides the protagonist? Your little love, Karen was her name,  I think? She reminded me of those. So I just started calling her that. No deeper meaning. Probably."

She nodded to herself, seemingly satisfied.

"Ah, but there's something I have to tell you. I called you here after all. Consider it a little bonus. A bonus!"

Then she disappeared completely from my field of view. The next moment my chest was burning up. Really badly burning up.

I collapsed to the ground and grasped my chest in pain.

"Oh my, that hurts a bit more than I expected, it seems."

"Haaa.... Haaa... Whaaatt... Did youu... Doo?"

I tried asking a question between my wheezing and heavy breathing.

"Nothing much. I just gave you a little help. You are, after all, a monster. It would be boring if you don't make use of that."

Just what did she do. My chest was on fire.

"You seem to lack some little drive, so I gave you a bit. You are after all a tentacle monster. Yes, a tentacle monster! Don't you understand your job? Go and attack some cute girls! Ah, but I'm not actually expecting you to do that, don't worry. But you seemed to have a bit of a lack of understanding about what you are and what you can do, so I just burnt it into your soul crystal. Now you'll never forget it again! Well, you never knew so you never forgot in the first place."

Slowly, the fire was subsiding. I looked up.

And was scared.

I didn't know what had happened just now but I could see the mana everywhere a lot more clearly now. And I could see the thing in front of me.

This is no person! This is a fucking monster!

There was no mana in this person. Like a hole, like a black stain she stood there, rejecting all mana, destroying all mana. I vaguely remembered someone saying that mana was contained in every living being, and yet, this thing in front of me defied this rule. When I tried to look at her, to sense the mana around her, I felt pure danger. Like something trying to suck me in. And then to devour me.

"Oh? You look quite scared, mhm. I thought you could see it already, but I guess I was wrong. Well, that's a bit of a bad side-effect. But it'll be okay. I won't eat you."

She assured me, but it sounded empty to my ears.

The girl, Yumias, turned around, her back facing me now.

"Well then, my child. Until we meet again."

A strong wind suddenly blew into my face and I had to close my eyes. When I opened them next, I was in front of the mercenary camp.

What happened just now?

I tried standing up, but only now I noticed how my legs were shivering, making it hard to stand up. Ultimately, I still managed to get up, carefully.

Let's return... Karen and Lily are waiting... Ah, and maybe Rina as well. Surely, Maya, Emily and Sele are waiting as well. Maybe they'll sulk. I still didn't get to apologise. Let's return.

Then, it dawned on me.

Returning... Ah, it's like that, isn't it? Let's return home, to my family.

Every person has a story to tell. It might be the story of their life until now, their present struggles or their dreams for the future. Everyone has a story to tell. Karen and Rina were exiled from their home country for being a type of manakin that went against their religious belief. Lily was picked up by mercenaries and raised by them. Emily was found all alone in a forest, Maya grew up with the mercenaries without parents, Sele was abused by her parents and they gave her away. Wanda was a seamstress in the slums. Even the young woman I only met shortly, Lune, was taking care of children and called an orphanage mother. Surely, Korwen, Merim and Fenna had a story to tell as well. And the captain of the Black Guards too. There are little stories everywhere. Connecting with people means becoming a part of their story. And they, becoming a part of your own story. That's why it is important to listen to their stories. For they are part of your own. Even if they come all at once, even if nobody wants to tell them, listen to them. Listen to every story that is being told and remember them. And then, tell your own story. For your own story, is part of theirs. And one day, you might be able to say: 'Please listen to this story, to our story. The story of our life. The story of our struggles and our dreams.'

That you may remember our story for a long, long time. For our story, is now part of your own story.

Yumi

Rinne

Thank you all for reading. Really.

This is the first time I published a web novel and also the first time I wrote something this long, so I am sure there are quite a few mistakes.

That makes me feel even more grateful to you all that have read this far, are still reading or will read this in the future.

With that said, there's something I want to tell you all. No, I won't stop writing, it's too much fun for that.

I have set up a patreon page. If you feel like you want to support me a little, you can do that on patreon now. And for the price of a coffee (or rather two) you can read a bit ahead. There's at the moment only one chapter to read, though. Once I write a few more chapters I might be able to offer more.

This won't affect my regular Sunday schedule at all. Actually, it will, because I now have the next chapter already finished and can upload it here on time. No more praying I actually finish on Sunday and not in the middle of the night. Hurray!

Regardless of patreon, you can also support me by clicking that favourite button, rating the story or maybe even writing a review. Or a comment. I might not answer them always but I do read all your comments and I am really happy about them.

And that's it from me.

Again, thank you for reading. I hope you will continue following Yumi's little tale, as it is far from ending.

You can find story with these keywords: Taboo Journal, Read Taboo Journal, Taboo Journal novel, Taboo Journal book, Taboo Journal story, Taboo Journal full, Taboo Journal Latest Chapter