Chapter 51: -19- Got Caught

~~** Tachibana Shota’s Point of View **~~

I wondered how long she would be gone for this time?

So far it was never longer than a week, but would I really have to go a whole week without seeing or hearing from my wife? I had Chigusa here to keep me company, but she wasn’t a replacement for Mayuri-san.

My wife’s sultry laugh, the way she can’t help but tease me, the care she puts into everything she does around the house, and even the times she just sits next to me on the couch for no other reason than being there so my mind can feel her presence that much more acutely…

I held Chigusa tightly in my arms.

I never actually hated Chigusa for what she did, in dumping me. I just hated the loss she returned to my life when she left. What I saw Chigusa as when she stormed back into my life after summer break, when I found Mayuri-san was willing to stay, was nothing short of dangerous. Danger that she would come between me and my missing piece. The piece of the puzzle that solved who I was, Tachibana Shota, as a person and as a whole.

Simple or complex the explanation, it’s just how it is.

Even though I could make Chigusa happy, and even give Mayuri-san some relief by just going through with it by having sex with her daughter… I don’t want to. I don’t want to mislead Chigusa into thinking she’s more than she is right now to me, and I don’t want to delude myself into thinking I’m the kind of man who can handle the true needs of two women at the same time when I’m barely able to do what I can to keep my wife stable.

I’m neither blind, nor an idiot.

I know that Mayuri-san deep down can’t just get over a twenty year long relationship with a man whose child she bore and raised over half her life in only a few months. It’s been six years and even I… have lasting feelings for Nene, still.

Even if it was a fake marriage to her, it was anything but one to me.

I was too young to have had a sexual relationship with her, but I did everything a boy beginning his slow change into a man at that age possibly could have done in that situation, in wanting to protect a loved one.

Yes, I couldn’t pay the mortgage on this house at ten years old.

Yes, I sold the things which my parents gave to me to a second hand shop or to my friends at school for incidental money that she needed, money that she took from me with a sweet smile up front and then wept about downstairs to my mother as she crumbled inside from being so useless as to need me to provide for her.

I hurt Nene’s pride as a human in such a way, but it was never ever intentional.

My dad, Tachibana Arata wasn’t strict by any means, until he was. That strictness was reserved for me alone. It was his way of teaching me to become a man as great as he is, how to protect, care for, and love a woman as she needed to be loved, and I know I failed him…

I failed because I wasn’t stronger than I was. I wasn’t nearly as strong as he was. I couldn’t make Nene happy in the same way my father could make my mother.

Nene had a relationship with a cruel and horrific man, and it was far, far worse than anything she ever told my parents. As much as I leaned into Nene, my precious first wife, I also did my best to let her lean into me.

I can remember Kumi at night, asking me to help make her mother’s nightmares go away. She would always grab me tightly and wail quietly in a disjointed way. I told Kumi that she could leave it to me, her papa, to make her mama better.

It was only luck that when Nene would pull me into a stranglehold hug at night, that whatever terrors that kept haunting her from that relationship, they would slowly loosen their grip on her heart when I was there with her.

Kumi was a cute little thing, and I was her playmate as much as possible. Even though playing with girl’s toys did nothing for me, I made sure she got a new one often, even if it wasn’t the exact one she wanted, so she had something that was hers. I used to brush and tie up her hair and help her get dressed for school. We took baths together and she would often say that she would marry me, too, when she got older.  

Kumi never liked calling me Shota-nii when she could avoid doing so and chose to call me papa instead. Nene had a pained expression each time she heard it, but gave up scolding her daughter about it when she saw that the pain and cruelty she thought had also seeped into her daughter, hadn’t at all. Kumi was a well adjusted girl, she wasn’t tainted by the violence like Nene was, and I know it was what Nene wanted more than anything.

Nene wanted to be allowed to be happy. And I did my best to try and give that to her. But she couldn’t find that happiness with me, because I was a child.

I can say that Mayuri-san is my first in just about everything, only because she was my first in everything that was ever truly reciprocated. I had bathed naked with Nene and Kumi, so it’s not like I had never really seen a woman’s breasts before. I even bathed with my mother when I was younger. But it’s different when you are a boy compared to when you are a man.

Nene… never saw me as a man. Could I blame her for that?

There were differences in what is offered freely between people, based on age, finances, and merits.

Part of that is why Chigusa was my first sexual experience.

She gave that to me freely, spontaneously, likely for the merits I afforded her. But was it in exchange for the time I spent with her as her boyfriend? Was it for all that I bought her in her selfish use of me, that she felt it was a fair trade in return? Was it for any reason other than simply her own desire to lose her virginity just to keep up with a conversation her slutty friends would always eclipse her in experience about?

I could never know what really motivated her to do that with me that day.

Right now, my head was only a jumbled mess.

I usually wake up late, but I felt the pull of my heart to my bedroom early this morning. The place Mayuri-san should have been. I wanted her in my arms and I wanted to make love to her. I wanted to exchange the sweet scent of Chigusa from my body and replace it with her older less fragrant yet more alluring pheromone.

The one that beckoned me to her, endlessly.

I found the black lingerie she wore for me, and I carefully laid it out on her side of the bed. Just in case she came home, I wanted her to know I was in here, thinking of her.

I changed into my school clothes and went downstairs. Chigusa would eventually notice me missing if she hasn’t already and would probably like a cup of coffee, so I started it up for her, and found myself opening the door to the patio and taking a seat where those two usually would.

Sure enough, Chigusa came down, made herself a cup and sat down next to me.

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“Mom?” She asked.

I quietly nodded.

“It hurts, but I’m still happy from all you gave me last night, even if I’m not enough for you.”

She leaned into my shoulder, and I wrapped my arm around her.

“I’m sorry you found such a despicable person to fall in love with at the worst time. I’m sorry I can’t give you what you want the most.”

“Shota… from now on, can you please make time for me, properly? I can’t stop my crazy feelings for you, but I can control my impulses enough not to break the rules… Just don’t… push me away any more. Share my bed when you can, and leave to hers when you need to. I don’t need all of you, but I can’t go without you. If you can give me that much, then I can promise you it will be enough for me.”

“You’re as selfish as always, but I never hated you for it. I… will do what is possible, after I talk with my wife.”

“Didn’t she say not to tattle?”

“That’s exactly what we will be talking about, when she returns.”

Chigusa and I shared a kiss. It tasted like coffee and vanilla creamer. I wasn’t partial to them, but they weren’t unfamiliar flavors, either. I let her get up and walk away to finish getting ready for school.  

We left the house without any prepared bentos, but I decided to fund lunch with whatever Chigusa and I could get from the cafeteria. We would just have to make do with that until we got home.

I also needed to get my shit together.

I wanted to return to the Literature club, I wanted to get back to my regular writing schedule, and I wanted…

I wanted to have a nice dinner with Mayuri-san and Chigusa.

Chigusa wasn’t being needlessly clingy with me on our walk to school. She was satisfied only holding my hand and she was practically glowing for some strange reason. She always looked beautiful, but for some reason, maybe a trick with the sun’s light, she came off as radiant this morning.

Chigusa saw me all the way to the door of my classroom, where quite a sensual kiss was imparted to me before she sauntered off to her own class next door.

I was undoubtedly going to get shit from Raita for this, but how is it any different than any other day since Chigusa came back into my life after marrying Mayuri-san?

“Sho~o~o~ota!”

Raita flagged me down instantly.  

“We have a lot to talk about, oh best friend of mine! Uwa ha ha ha. Oh ho ho ho~”

Nobunaga have mercy on me, I think Raita’s finally fucking lost it. As class began, Raita placed his phone on my desk. He was showing off a picture of a cute girl who looked only too familiar. She was holding a piece of A-4 paper, and on it written in marker were the words, swipe right.

I gulped, brought a trembling index finger to Raita’s phone and did exactly that.

The next picture sent a chill up my spine.

It was Nene-san with her arm wrapped around my wife.

I looked over to Raita and he reached for his phone to take it back. I had avoided letting him see a picture of or even meet Mayuri-san, but it all became clear now. Raita knew Kumi… and somehow met with Nene-san who was together with… my wife?

Just what the hell exactly was she up to yesterday, and where was Kanna-san?

My own phone buzzed a moment later.

It was a text from my wife, who didn’t usually text at all. There was a multimedia attachment on it and when I opened the message… She was there in all her glory, in the black dress she wore for me at nighttime because I loved how she looked in it.

The message she wrote me along with the picture let me know she was waiting for me at home, and loved me a great deal.

I turned off my phone and pocketed it. Then I put my head on the desk and tried to do harness all the magical energy in my body to quietly teleport the fuck out of my classroom and back to my house.

Sadly… I’ve lost my chance to be a wizard already. Either that or this school has an anti-magic dampening field cast around it.

How did this happen? I can’t trust Raita to keep quiet about this, can I? How is this going to affect Chigusa and my school life now? And worse, did they by any chance say anything that would lead Raita into figuring out that Chigusa was pregnant!?

I was now dreading the lunchtime catastrophe that awaited me.

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